Letters
by Kimmae
Summary: The story of Lily Evans and Severus Snape, from beginning to end. WIP. Rating subject to change.
1. Severus and Lily

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing. _

_Letters_

by Kimmae

Chapter One: Severus and Lily

The wind was rustling the branches of the bush in which he was hiding in. He was staring at his oversized loafers and trying to disappear within his large coat. The girl—Lily—didn't come back. He'd waited for the past few days now, hoping...

Always making a muck of things. That's what his dad had said once. Absent-minded, mind you, but he said it all the same. And it was true; that was why he had no friends, not because of how poor he and his family were. He didn't know how to talk to people. That was why he had spent so much time trying to think of the right things to say to approach her, the only person around who was like him, besides his mum. But someone couldn't be friends _only_ with his mum.

Maybe it was the way he leapt out of the bushes while they were playing. Maybe spying on people wasn't the best way to meet others and make friends. Then again, she seemed to be offended when he called her a witch, which was exactly what she was. She had _loads_ of magic, and she didn't even to seem to know what that meant at all. He would have been able to show her, to tell her everything, but she had run away.

It was all that Muggle's fault, the girl's sister. Tooney, whatever kind of name that was. Muggles and their names. She had been the one that took Lily away. If only he had the chance to explain himself; that's all it ever was, never a chance to explain. People jumped to conclusions too early, leaving him feeling guilty and small. If he could talk to the girl again, he'd set everything straight. He just had no way of finding her except the park.

"Lily, _don't_!"

When he looked up, his heart seized. All the hoping and praying he did worked; as if _magic_ brought her back. At the gate stood the blonde haired girl who had ruined things the first time; marching across the playground with purpose, straight towards him, was just the girl he had been hoping to see. "Lily!" the Muggle shrieked again. "I'm telling Mummy!"

With that, Tooney took off down the street and raced back the way she had come, off to do the bidding she had warned her sister she would do. Lily glanced back and paused for a few moments, watching her sister go. Severus Snape stayed crouched, petrified and as still as stone. He was sure Lily would take off after her sister and try to not get into trouble—that's what Severus would have done.

But Lily turned back and advanced toward him again, the same high and confident air in her step as before. He stood up as she got closer, clamouring clumsily out of the bush. He decided to keep his mouth closed and let her have the first word this time. Maybe it would go better that way.

Lily stopped in front of him, her fists clenched at her sides and her feet planted firmly together, standing ramrod straight.

"Tuney told me not to talk to you."

"Why?" he asked, a little affronted.

"She says you're a mean liar. And... and a creep."

"I'm not," he protested, "I'm like you."

"Why did you call me a witch?"

"Because you are!"

"That's an awfully mean thing to say, though."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is," she said, planting her fists on her hips. "Witches are green and ugly with long noses and warts."

"Who told you that?"

"I read it. In a book."

Severus frowned as if he had swallowed a lemon whole. "Witches don't look like that at all. They look normal. Like you."

"How do you know?"

"Well, because. That's what everybody looks like."

"What do you mean 'everybody'?"

Of course, she was raised by Muggles. She wouldn't know. "The wizarding world. It's full of people like you and me."

"The... wizarding world."

"Lily! Lily, Mummy says to come back _now_!"

Lily spun around, her dark red hair flying. "I have to go. I'll come back soon!" She took off across the park, running towards her sister and leaving Severus behind. From up the street a blonde woman emerged, wearing an apron over her spring dress and yellow rubber gloves on her hands. Severus could make out what looked like mild concern on her face as her children raced toward her. They stood at the edge of the street for a while, their mother questioning them. Then the Tooney girl turned and pointed at Severus. Immediately he turned tail and fled, all but diving back into the bushes. A few branches poked and prodded at him, and one made his eye water. He sat still for an eternity, not even daring to breathe for a whole minute. When he felt he had given it enough time, he slowly poked his head out over the bush. The three ladies were gone.

Brushing himself off and heaving a great sigh, he sneaked out to the swing set and sat down. She said she would be back soon. He would wait.

When the sun started to set, he trudged his way home, dragging his feet the entire way. Maybe her mother didn't let her come back because she'd caught a glimpse of the too-short jeans and the too-big coat. "Can't have my daughter hanging around that lot," she'd likely have thought. What if he'd messed up _twice_ in a row?

When he got home, his father was alone in the sitting room, a mug in his hand. He was staring at the empty wall across from him. Severus's mother was crying softly somewhere upstairs, and he could just barely hear her.

He went into the kitchen, cut himself half a block of cheese, then took it up to his room to eat. After he finished it, he brushed off the crumbs, climbed into bed, and lay staring at the ceiling. He _hoped_ the Lily girl would come back soon. He would wait for her every day.

He didn't have to wait long. Breakfast lasted all of three minutes for Severus before he bolted out the door and down the street to the park. He sat on the swing deftly, staring at the avenue of which Lily and her sister usually came from. Shortly before noon, he saw her dark red hair shimmering like a garnet in the sunlight as she journeyed toward him. This time her sister was not with her—she was alone, and Severus was so excited that a smile crept onto his lips.

She stood in front of Severus on the swing set, who had stood up to meet her her. "My mum said I didn't have to go out with my sister anymore. My name is Lily, by the way."

"I'm Severus."

"Severus? That's an odd name."

"Tooney's an odd name."

"It is not!" Lily cried indignantly. "It stands for _Petunia_. I call her Tuney for short. I've never met someone named Severus before."

"I'm named after a great-great grandfather. Or something like that," explained Severus.

"Oh. Was he... was he part of the _wizarding_ _world_ too?"

"Yeah. And back and back and back," he said. "Everybody. But my dad."

"What's your dad like?"

Severus shrugged. "Muggle."

"What's that mean?"

"Not a witch or wizard. Like your sister. Probably your parents, too."

"Is that a bad thing?" she asked with a moderate amount of concern.

"No. It just means they can't be a part of the wizarding world."

"Oh." She strode forward and sat on the swing next to Severus. He sat back down as well. "So your mum can do magic, too?" she asked.

"Mhm. Though she doesn't do it much anymore. Dad gets mad at her when she does."

"Why would he do that?"

"Says it's not right. Not what normal people do."

"That sounds like what Tuney says."

"Well... what they think doesn't matter. We'll get to go to Hogwarts and learn about it all there."

"_Hog warts_?" Lily repeated, sounding halfway between fascinated and repulsed. "What are hog warts?"

"It's a school, for people like us," he said.

"Hogwarts," she said, as if to test it out on her tongue. Then she looked pensive, staring at the ground intently. They sat in silence for a while.

"Severus?"

His name sounded like honey coming from her. It jerked at his chest and made the corners of his lips turn upward. "Yeah?"

"What's it like? The wizarding world?"

In all honesty, he had no clue. He'd never seen it, never had the chance to walk a single wizarding street. All he knew about it was the snippets his mother used to tell him, before his father insisted he go to a Muggle school to receive some sort of education instead of staying at home and rotting away into a "layabout wizard type." Ever since his mother stopped telling him stories of Hogwarts, and all he had was the reassurance that he would most certainly be attending the school, not before long. He just had to wait one more year.

"Is it big?" she asked when he didn't answer.

Severus shook his head. "Not really. It's actually in London, for the most part. There are witches and wizards everywhere, and they're really good at getting Muggles not to notice them. That's why most people don't know about it."

"But are there—dragons, and things?"

"Oh, yes," he said, holding out his hands to show gigantic size. "_Big_ dragons. But the Ministry keeps them hidden."

"The Ministry?"

"The wizard government. Ministry of Magic. The Minister of Magic is like the Muggle Pine Minister."

"Prime Minister."

"Yeah, that."

Lily looked a little worried. "What else is there?"

"Giant squids, banshees, ghosts, Dementors, hippogriffs, house elves—"

"_Dementors_?" Lily repeated. "What are those?"

"Scary monsters that float around in black cloaks, scaring wizards and sucking happiness from them. Only wizards and witches can see them—Muggles can't."

"Do they... do they _kill_ people?"

"Not kill. But they can suck out your soul. Usually people who break the law get them."

Lily looked visibly shaken. She hugged her arms and looked down. "The wizarding world sounds a bit scary."

"It's not so bad. Most wizards are good. They can fight off the Dementors."

"Severus, will you show me?"

He nodded. "When we're eleven, we'll both get to go. When's your birthday?"

"In January."

"Same as mine. We'll get to go in the same year. Then I can show you everything."

Lily stared up at the sky, looking thoughtful. Then she started to push back and swing her legs out, climbing higher and higher. Severus joined her too, slowly building momentum until he was at her height. "I'm going to jump!" she said. At the bottom of her swing, she swung her legs upward and soared, flying high over the swing set in a gracious arc and landing without disturbing the sand.

Severus cheered after her, and she spun toward him, smiling. "Now, you jump, too!"

He did.

After several weeks of visiting each other, in which more than once Lily had decided not to be friends with Severus and then immediately went straight back to the park, Mr. and Mrs. Evans wanted to meet the boy their daughter was so enraptured with. At least, that's what Lily said. For all he knew she begged and cried for him to come visit the family. That Tooney girl probably kicked and screamed, crying bloody murder that this wizard boy was from unfavourable stock. In any case, when Lily relentlessly asked Severus to visit her home, he finally broke down.

He lied to his mother, telling her he was just going to the park and he would be home before eight. She didn't seem to be concerned in the slightest where he was going; she didn't so much as say goodbye when Severus stepped out the front door.

He went straight to the park, and Lily was sitting on the swing, waiting his arrival. She stood when he came close. "I was worried you wouldn't come. Let's go, dinner's gonna be soon!"

They ran all the way from the park to Lily's home, which turned out not to be too far at all. Her house was two storeys tall, with creme siding and red shingles. It looked quaint and welcoming. She led him up the cobblestone path (which ran through a garden) and stood on her front doorstep. Lily had to use both hands in order to open the heavy oak door, and she looked at him with a beaming smile. "You go first."

Severus walked inside tentatively like he was walking into a dragon's lair, but he relaxed as he drank in the sight of Lily's life. Everything was warm and homey looking; a huge contrast to his own home.

She took his large loafers from him and put them on the shoe rack. "Wanna come sit and watch the telly before it's ready?" she asked.

Severus balked. "The what?"

"Telly. Television. TV. Right?"

"Uh..."

"I would've thought you had one, your dad being a Muggle and everything. It's like the live paintings you've told me about, except more interesting. Come on."

She led him through a room that had a few couches and chairs and a grandfather clock on the far wall. The next room was separated by French doors, and inside it had another couch, some bookshelves, and an odd brown box sitting in the middle.

"You've really never seen a telly before?" Lily asked.

Severus shook his head.

"Well... I hope you like it. Come on, sit down."

So he sat on the couch next to Lily as she fiddled with a dial on the face of the box. There was a popping sound (Severus jumped) and the front of the box began to light up. Then he could see the outline of people moving about, and as the screen became brighter and brighter, they began to make noise.

A woman on screen was giving wild eyes to a man and brandishing a frying pan, shrieking at him over something to do with dinner. A line appeared between Severus's eyebrows. Lily giggled at what she said, and the man stormed out of the room. As he did, Severus looked to some of the paintings on the wall. Oh, no, they were Muggle paintings, he wouldn't be appearing there anytime soon.

"Where did he go?" asked Severus.

"Who?"

"The man in the telly. Where is he now?"

"He went into his own living room, I guess," Lily said.

"Oh."

The woman was now smacking a turkey with the frying pan, and a chorus of laughter sounded around them. Severus jumped again and looked around the room. "Where did that come from?"

"The TV," she said.

"But _who's laughing_?"

"The audience," Lily replied, now looking a little annoyed.

"You mean, other people watching this right now?"

"Not right now, no. When they recorded it."

"_What_?"

"Muggles go somewhere and play pretend, then they watch it through these things called video recorders, and then they replay the scene for us to watch at home."

"That's the most bizarre thing I've ever heard!" Severus said, then leaned toward the television.

"Excuse me!" he said to the woman, who clearly appeared to be ignoring him.

"_Severus_," Lily hissed, taking him by the arm and pulling him back against the couch. "It doesn't work like that!"

"I thought you said it was like a wizard painting," he retorted.

"It is!"

"Those paintings talk back, though," said Severus. "You can't even make eye contact with the people in this box!"

Lily blinked and looked increasingly more perplexed. Just at that moment, however, another French door opened from behind the couch, and in walked the blonde woman Severus had seen several weeks prior, the second time Lily ran away from him. "Ah, I thought I heard another voice. You must be Severus; I've been looking forward to meeting you!"

She had oven mitts on her hands, which she promptly removed to shake Severus's hand. No one had ever done that with him before, and his arm was a limp noodle from mere surprise as she shook it. "I hope you like chicken and potatoes, Severus," she said cheerily. "Oh, for heaven's sake, look at me. My name is Marigold Evans, Lily's mother. You can call me Mrs. Evans, or just Mum—I would like that very much. Mr. Evans will be home shortly. Do you want to munch on some bread while you wait?"

"Uh... no. Thanks." Severus said. Lily's mother had been talking at an alarming speed and he barely caught most of her message.

"Lily, go get your sister and help me set the table. Severus, you can relax and watch the telly a little longer, dear."

"No, thanks," Severus said quickly. He'd had enough of Muggle television for one night. "Can I help, too?"

"O—h, Lily, I like this boy already!" said Mrs. Evans. "All right, come with me, sweetheart!"

Lily had brought Petunia into the kitchen where Severus was taking plates from Mrs. Evans to set on the table, and immediately the girl narrowed her eyes at him like he was an insect. "What is _he_ doing here?"

"Now, now, Petunia, don't be rude to our guest," Mrs. Evans said sternly, shaking a wooden spoon at her daughter.

"Our _guest_?" Petunia cried in dismay. "But, _Mummy—_!"

"That's enough, now, or you can go to bed without any supper."

Lily looked torn; she most certainly did not want her sister to get into any trouble, and she did not want her sister insulting her friend. With a great huff, Petunia turned her back on Severus and snatched up some silverware from a drawer, angrily wiping at her eyes.

As the table was set and the food laid out, Mr. Evans came home. He tiredly walked in to the kitchen and sat down at the table, barely offering his family a smile before dishing out his plate.

"John, dear," Mrs. Evans said, "this is Severus, Lily's friend."

Mr. Evans looked up from his plate with bloodshot eyes. Lily received all her looks from her father; the dark red hair, the bright green eyes. And from the erratic zeal her mother displayed, Severus was quick to assume Lily's gentle and accepting personality came from this man.

As his face lit up in a warm smile, Severus couldn't help but smile back, too. "Well met, son," she said, reaching across the table and shaking Severus's hand. He looked old and tired—his temples were flecked with white and there were great bags under his eyes. But there was still something young about his face, which suggested to Severus that he was simply overtired and overworked, in a much different way from his own father.

"Sorry I'm a bit late, dear," he said softly, his voice croaking, "but there was a bit of a problem with my last case today. Had to sort out some pent up emotions with the parents."

"Oh, dear," Mrs. Evans sighed. "We had best not talk about it at the dinner table, then. Delicate ears about."

Severus looked up curiously, but had been conditioned into not asking questions from adults, so kept his mouth shut. Once Mr. Evans had filled his plate with a heaping serving of potatoes, he passed on the dish to his wife, who then passed to Petunia, Lily, and then Severus. There was baked chicken breast in lemons, glazed potatoes, and mountains of corn to be had. Despite the lurch his stomach gave at the potatoes (he'd been eating nothing but at home for several weeks), Severus felt he was attending a feast.

The rest of the dinner was filled with idle chatter, but Petunia and Severus remained silent. The former was simply bent out of shape over Severus's presence; the latter was scared that he'd open his mouth and destroy his delicate balance between friend and outcast with Lily and her family. He didn't know how much Lily had indulged to her parents over their meetings about the wizarding world, and the last thing he wanted to do was bring it up first and shatter the peace, which was the usual result whenever he spoke.

Through their airy discussion, Severus discovered Lily's father was a lawyer. He was able to deduce that that kind of a job was similar to the witches and wizards in the Wizengamot, or the Department of Magical Law Enforcement that his mother used to tell him about. Mrs. Evans appeared to be a stay at home mother, and Petunia was doing very well in seventh grade English studies.

After dinner, they had a dessert which was called trifle or trufle—he couldn't remember which—but whatever it was, it was _delicious_. He wasn't abashed at all to take seconds, which Mr. Evans scooped onto his plate with a hefty helping.

Once they finished dining, Severus and Lily helped clean the dishes and put away the leftovers (of which there were little), and then Mrs. Evans sent them off to play. "Just be back before sundown," she called after them. Lily had decided they should go to their secret hiding place, which was a glade not too far from the park in which they met.

"Have you told them anything? About Hogwarts?" asked Severus.

"No. I'm too scared to."

"Why?"

"What if they think I'm lying? I have no way to prove it to them."

"It'll happen eventually. You'll see. We'll get to go to Hogwarts together."

"I really want to, Severus," she said. "Promise you'll stick by me when we get there?"

"Yeah," he said. She held out her pinky. He stared at it bewilderingly for a moment before she poked him with it and he hooked his own pinky around it. "What's that do?"

"It's a pinky swear. Tuney taught it to me. Now you can't go back on your promise."

"I'd never," he said proudly.


	2. The Birthday Gone Wrong

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing. _

Chapter Two: The Birthday Gone Wrong

Winter was light and hardly distinguishable from fall. Snow finally fell before Christmas came, but it did nothing to make Severus's holiday any better than the last ten. Mr. Snape had forbade a tree to ever go up under his roof, and gifts were given discreetly between mother and son, handed under the table or passed in the hallway. This year there were no gifts; pay cuts at the mill demanded changes be made. The week of Christmas and New Years they ate nothing but potatoes and peas.

Then his birthday came. They were still living on a tighter budget, but he didn't need gifts or a big meal. Lily came to spend the day with him.

At first he was embarrassed that she saw his house. The day had been going poorly to begin with—his father had been short with his mother, the peas were cold and sticky, and he had to wear yesterday's socks and drawers because his mother had forgotten to do laundry. As he was drying dishes while his mother washed them, there was a knock on the door.

Eileen paused, looked over her shoulder, and frowned in the general direction of the door. Severus looked as well, although his expression was more of dread. He hastily stuffed the plate he held in the dish cupboard and rushed to the door before his father could get there. He unlocked the bolt and discarded the chain lock, then opened the door halfway to peer out.

Outlined by the white and grey street was Lily. Her brilliant dark red hair was the most vibrant thing he'd ever seen, especially framed by the bright white snow. Her eyes lit up the moment she saw him. "Happy birthday, Severus!" she said, holding up a package.

"What are you doing here?" he immediately retorted.

Her face fell a bit. He grit his teeth. "Sorry, I just mean—how did you find out where I lived?"

"What's at the door, then?" his father called out behind him. Severus immediately darted out and closed the door, standing in his T-shirt and socking feet.

"I—I'm sorry. Tuney told me where you lived. I wanted to surprise you... I didn't mean to make you angry."

"I am. Surprised, that is." He looked her over anxiously; she appeared crestfallen, and he had no idea how to repair it. "What's that?"

She looked at the box. "It's a fruitcake. Mum taught me how to make them."

"Thanks." He gently took the box. T=He stood there awkwardly holding it between him and her, and the silence grew bigger and longer.

"What are you doing today?" she asked timidly.

"Nothing."

"Want to go to the park?"

He looked around. "Isn't it too cold for that?"

"Well..."

"Hold on," he said quickly, "I'll go get my coat."

He ran inside, dashed up the stairs, deposited his gift under the bed, then ran back down to stuff his feet in his boots and shove his arms in his enormous coat. Before either of his parents could stop him and ask him just what he was rushing about for, he was out the door again, next to Lily.

"Ready?" he asked. She smiled warmly and nodded.

So they set off, mostly silent but once in a while throwing questions at one another ("Your parents didn't plan anything for you?" "They let you go out without finishing your chores?"), but once they reached the playground, which was blissfully deserted besides themselves, they broke into more conversations about the wizarding world. Luckily for Severus, Lily had endless questions to ask, and she most certainly never tired of hearing the same story twice.

The afternoon wore on, and just as he was thinking they would spend the entire day talking about magic and Hogwarts, she fell silent and started to pack snow together. "Want to make a snowman?" she asked.

He knew what snowmen were—he'd seen some of the other children at school make them once before. But he didn't understand the novelty of it. "Why?"

"It's fun," she said with a broad smile, already starting a giant snowball. "You can give them personality."

An image in his head popped up of a snowman strutting about in a smoking jacket barking orders at children, but Severus decided Lily did not mean her words literally. He agreed to help her build one, her giving him tips now and again. After they built the first one, he still didn't know how to feel about making them, but after the third and fourth (they used up all the snow in the park), he was starting to enjoy it.

"Want to make another?" he asked as he brushed the snow off his jeans.

Lily looked up at the sky; the sun was setting and turning the world pink and yellow. "I can't, Severus, I'm sorry. I should be heading home for dinner."

"Oh."

"But we can make them when the next snowfall comes!" she assured, trying to cheer him. "And my birthday—we're having a party. Would you come, Severus? Oh, please say you will."

"Yeah, sure. When is it?"

"The thirtieth. On my birthday. It's a Saturday. Come around lunch time."

"Okay. Will I see you before then?"

"Of course. But, um... is it okay if I come to your house?"

"You'd better not. I'll come stand outside yours."

Once again, she looked like she had taken a blow from him. "All... right. Sorry. That I came today."

He shook his head. "I don't want you to see that."

She gave him a sober look before slowly heading home.

That night at the dinner table, the air was thick and full of anger. "You left before finishing your chores," his father said, sombrely cutting his potato.

Severus said nothing. It was best to just remain silent and let Mr. Snape berate your person without interruption, or else it got longer and harsher. "You won't do it again."

"Yes," Severus agreed complacently.

"Yes, _sir_."

"Yes, sir."

The rest of dinner was quiet and brooding. After the meal, Severus helped his mother clean. He waited for her to say her customary "Happy Birthday" to him, but she never did. The look on her face told him she was far away. When he went up to bed, he reached for the parcel hidden under the bed frame, and opened the box carefully, making sure neither his mother or father heard the paper ripping. A flood of pleasant smells brushed across his face when the box was opened—lemon, cranberry, mango—and most prominently—cinnamon. He squinted at it through the dark, trying to get a good look at it; he wanted to appreciate his best birthday present as much as he could. With the faint streetlight, he could vaguely see HAPPY BIRTHDAY written on the face of the cake in red icing. He took off a chunk of the corner and ate it slowly at first, but lost self control three bites in and devoured two more chunks in seconds flat. He hadn't had anything so delicious in months.

Deciding he should savour the gift, Severus finally found the will to put the box back under the bed and save the rest for later. It would be his only decadence while they could not afford other food. He also made sure to keep it a secret from his mother and father—he wanted it all to himself. And besides, if his father had found it, it would be promptly thrown out. "If we all can't enjoy it, none of us will," he would say before upending it into the trash bin.

The cake lasted for three days before it spoiled. He took it down the street and deposited it into a trash bin, like he was going to a private funeral. For some reason, he was more stricken about losing the cake than he thought he ought to have been.

When Lily's birthday approached, Severus tried desperately to find her a decent gift. He had little pocket money, but after hearing when her party was, he saved what little he was given from his father. Since the currency was being revolutionized by the government (Severus remembered hearing the word decimal thrown around by his father once or twice), he was receiving very little, just to ensure they had enough to "prepare for the worst," in his father's words. Severus didn't understand much of it, and it only made him eager to immerse himself in wizarding currency, which seemed much less complicated.

In any case, he had collected all his pocket money and ran down to the bakery by the tea shop Lily had taken him once. He asked the lady for a birthday cake, but it cost sixteen pence, and he only had seven. In the end, he could afford nothing of worth in the bakery, so instead went to the flower shop. He was able to afford a single flower with his money. He didn't remember what it had been called—it wasn't a rose, but it was a deep shade of red, and he knew upon seeing it that it was meant to be Lily's. Then, with nervous feet, he took himself to the Evans' household.

By the time he got there, he had lost feeling in his fingers and toes, and his nose was starting to drip. He sniffed constantly, but it did nothing to stem the flow of snot. When he knocked on the door, he quickly wiped his nose on his sleeve, just to avoid looking shabby when Lily opened the door.

A blast of warmth and sweet smells greeted Severus when Mrs. Evans opened the door. "Oh, Severus, what a pleasant surprise! I almost thought you wouldn't be joining us today! And—oh, look at this lovely flower. Is this for Lily? Why, that's thoughtful of you. Please, come in, the children are playing games in the family room, you must join them!"

All this was said with such alacrity that Severus felt his head spinning. She led him inside and took his coat from him, and he noticed her make a small face at the smear on his sleeve. As she walked away, he crept into the family room.

No one noticed his entrance, so he hovered by the doorway. The first thing he saw was her bright red hair flying; she was twirling on the spot with a blindfold over her eyes, three girls around her pushing her along. She wore a dark green dress, white stockings, and polished black shoes. Her skirts shimmered in the light when she spun. She looked lovely.

Finally one of the girls grabbed her shoulders from behind, held her still, then gently shoved her forward. Lily stumbled clumsily, holding out something black with a tack at the top, and headed for the wall, where a poster board with the picture of a tailless donkey hung.

Severus wrinkled his nose as he watched Lily stumble to the picture. This must have been some obscure Muggle game he'd never heard about. When she reached the poster board, she patted her hands along the frame, trying to get a feel for where she was. Then she promptly stuck the tack in the poster and removed her blindfold. The tail sat about an inch above the donkey's hind end.

"Oh, well," she said, "that was pretty g—Severus!"

All the girls turned to the doorway were Severus stood as Lily rushed toward him. She had the biggest smile on her face he had seen yet. He looked around at all the other girls in the room—he was the only boy. None of them wore remotely approving expressions. Petunia's was the most sour scowl of all.

"These are my friends from school," Lily said warmly. "Everyone, this is Severus—he lives down the road from us."

"Down the road?" Petunia repeated with sauce.

Lily eyed her sister, but chose to ignore the comment. "We were playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey. Have you ever played before?" she asked him.

"No." He sounded affronted that she would even ask such a thing.

But Lily chose to let that comment roll off her skin like rain as well. "Come on, then, it's your turn!"

"I don't—"

"I'll take this," she said excitedly, gently taking the fragile flower from him with a grateful smile, "and you put on this!"

"But I think—"

"Like this!" She shoved the blindfold over his head and snugly fit it over his eyes. He stood still for her as she adjusted it, then she led him out to the middle of the room.

"No, Lily," he said through gritted teeth.

"Just one game." She then abandoned him on the floor, rushed off somewhere, then came back to shove something in his hand. "Try to pin the tail close to where it should go," she instructed. The other girls around him scoffed—who needs instructions on how to play Pin the Tail? Lily was not accepting no for an answer, so he grudgingly let her turn him over and over on the spot. When she stopped him, she gently pushed him forward.

"Straight ahead, Severus!"

"Don't give him hints!" another girl snapped.

He shuffled forward, his hands out, feeling a little humiliated and angry. When he felt the board under his hands, he thought, _Just get it right and show these Muggles_, and promptly stuck the pin on the picture. He removed his blindfold and smiled to himself; he had gotten it right on the rear.

"You cheated," Petunia said nastily from the other side of the room.

"I did not," he shot back.

Lily's delicate confidence was already wavering. She looked around the room. "Severus didn't cheat, he's just really good at everything."

This made his chest swell with pride, and he smiled at Lily appreciatively. The other girls were far from convinced, however. "That just sounds like he's a big pig head," some brown haired girl said. This made all the others laugh cheerily, all but Lily.

"No, it means I'm just smarter than all you dumb Muggles!" He flared with anger before storming to the front door. As he stuffed his feet in his boots, he heard some girl repeat the word "Muggle" derisively, sounding another chorus of laughter from the others. He snatched up his coat and rushed from the house before even putting it on. His heart was thudding so hard and the chagrin made his thoughts fuzzy and incoherent. He was simply mad at everything. So he took to the park and started to kick down all the snowmen he and Lily made (they were half melted anyway) and sat down on the swing when he was done.

About twenty minutes later, he was still angry, but a burst of remorse struck him once he saw Lily run up the street to the park. She slowed when she caught sight of all the destroyed snowmen, and then hurried over to Severus on the swing. He could tell that she was very sad.

"What happened to our snowmen?" she asked. "Who kicked them down?"

He hung his head. "I dunno."

"That's so... why would somebody do such a thing?"

"It's nothing."

"It's nothing?" Severus was starting to wish he could think about what he was saying before he said it. "We made those together. That was a fun day—you had so much fun."

"It's a dumb Muggle thing, anyway," he retorted, kicking up snow in the small ditch beneath his seat, "just like your friends."

There was stunned silence, and at once Severus knew that was the worst possible thing he could have said to her, short of "I hate you." He looked up at her slowly, and found her with tears in her eyes.

"That wasn't a very nice thing to say," she said quietly, her voice quavering. "Are non-magic people that different?"

He turned his head away.

"You said being Muggle-born didn't matter, in the wizarding world. Why would being a normal Muggle be any different?"

"They just... don't understand," he said, immediately thinking of his father.

"Maybe it's you who doesn't understand!" Lily shouted with a sob, tears trailing down her cheeks from both eyes. "Why do you always have to be like this, Severus?" With that, she turned and ran, leaving a streak of red in her wake.

"Wait!" he called, but she did not. She hurried all the way back home, not once looking back at Severus. He watched her go, trying to think of all the reasons he was right, but only coming up with the reasons why he was so wrong. He hung his head, and the anger was slowly displaced by guilt and frustration.

This had to be the worst year for birthdays, overall.


	3. The First Years and Hogwarts

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing._

_Additional Note: This chapter contains the Hogwarts Acceptance Letter as found in _Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, _by J.K. Rowling, Raincoast Books, p. 42_

Chapter Three: The First Years and Hogwarts

Ten months came and went as if they only lasted days. Severus and Lily had become quite close, but neither went to the other's house too often, not since the birthday incidents. They spent their time in the glade or the park, and when it got cold, they would visit the tea parlour on the east side of Cokeworth. They spent as much of their time outdoors as possible, away from the sight of Muggles so that they could talk freely about magic in privacy.

Then came the day the Hogwarts Acceptance Letter arrived.

Severus's was waiting for him with his mother; she had hidden it from his father so that he wouldn't get angry and throw it away. It had arrived while he was still sleeping—the owl had tapped impatiently on his window for twenty minutes before trying the kitchen window, where Eileen Snape had been making breakfast. When she placed it in his hands, a rare smile was on her face, and that made Severus light up as well. The paper was soft under his hands. The purple wax seal gleamed up at him like a godsend, and the green ink with his exact whereabouts on it twinkled in the faint light of the kitchen. It was his wishes come true in tangible form. He tore it open greedily and read it over and over.

_Dear Mr. Snape,_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress_

The second page was full of things he would need as a first year. There was a bubble of excitement rising in his chest; he was finally going to go. "When can we go?" he asked his mother excitedly. "To Diagon Alley? Where can we find an owl?"

"Eat your breakfast," she replied placidly, taking the letter from Severus and tucking it into her apron. He wolfed down his eggs and bacon as fast as he could, then launched out of his chair and ran for the door. His mother didn't even bother asking where he was going; she knew by now, and in any case, she didn't seem to care if he stayed or went.

Now that he knew where Lily's house was by heart, he forewent the park and headed straight for her quaint, refreshing home, compared to the dregs of Cokeworth in which he lived. But he didn't dare run up the cobblestone path; he hung back uncertainly, looking up at the front door, the bay window which overlooked the front garden. Eventually he would be spotted by one of the members of the Evans family, and they would send Lily out to meet him.

After a painstaking twenty minutes, Lily came rushing out the front door and raced toward him. The letter was clasped in her had and the broadest smile he'd ever seen was glowing on her face.

"Severus!" she cried. "They came to our house! They talked to Mum and Dad and—Severus, we get to go together! On September the first!"

Severus smiled triumphantly. "I told you they'd let you go."

She brandished the letter, waving it excitedly. "It was a nice man who came to my house. He said his name was Horace Slughorn. Do you know him?" He shook his head. "Who came to your house?" she asked.

"No one, just got the letter. They don't send teachers to wizards' houses, remember?"

"Oh, right." Lily's face was flushed and a permanent smile was stretched on her face. "Wow."

"Let's go celebrate," he suggested.

The two of them headed off to the glade, where they pretended to fly brooms, have duels, and they transformed leaves into flowers (at one point, Severus accidentally set a leaf on fire). Both of them were elated beyond reason.

"Would you go with me? To Diagon Alley? My parents asked me to ask you and your mum."

Severus shrugged. "I could just take you," he said. In actuality, Severus had no idea where Diagon Alley was (his mother mentioned a bar once or twice, but never the specific whereabouts of it), but he wanted desperately to show Lily more of what she didn't know, he wanted to be the one she looked up to.

"Oh, I'm so excited, Severus!" she said in utter delight. "What do you think it'll be like? What will they teach us?"

"About magical creatures, transforming things, small charms, magical plants, potions... a bunch of stuff."

"And you're sure the Dementors won't be there?"

"Never."

She rolled onto her back and stared at the canopy of leaves above; Lily tended to do this when she was deep in thought about something. "Tell me more, Severus. About the subjects. They're nothing like Muggle school, are they?"

"Not really," he replied, then proceeded to divulge what he knew about each of the classes. He once read through one of his mother's old textbooks, which he kept hidden under a floorboard in his room, so his father wouldn't see it and get angry. It talked about attack spells and how to defend yourself against other witches and wizards. He had been fascinated by the topic—it was in a chapter called "The Dark Arts."

"I don't think I like the sound of that one," she said nervously, then asked him to tell her about something else.

They spent the entire day together, and when it was time to go home for dinner, they parted ways at the park. That night, Severus was still brimming with topics he wanted to talk about, but his father was at the dinner table, so he didn't dare open his mouth. He wondered if his father knew that he was leaving Muggle school for Hogwarts yet.

"How old are you?" Tobias Snape asked after a prolonged silence, stabbing at his pork.

Severus froze. His father rarely asked him a direct question, unless it was about a topic that would get him in trouble. "Eleven," he responded guardedly.

"It's time you took up some work around the house," Tobias declared with a tone that broached no argument.

Eileen fiddled with her knife nervously. "Severus already washes the—"

"I didn't _ask_ you," Tobias shot sternly, cutting off his wife. She ducked her head compliantly.

From the letter Severus had inherited a new found bravery; he was stronger, wiser, better now, because he had received admission to the best wizarding school in Britain. He puffed up his chest, looked at his father, and said: "Don't talk to her like that."

Tobias stopped mid-bite and stared at his son with a glare that could curdle milk. "What did you say?"

Severus felt himself deflating instantly, but he decided now was too late to back down. What would Lily think if she saw him cower in fear? "I said, don't talk to her like that!"

Tobias turned the air blue and slammed his fist on the table so hard that the plates rattled and the water sloshed about. He stood up, and any sense of courage and empowerment Severus had felt before was washed away instantly; his insides went cold and he visibly shrunk inside of his father, who reached down and grabbed the boy by the neck of his smock.

Eileen shrieked and leapt up from her chair, shouting for her husband to stop. Tobias dragged Severus into the sitting room, sat down on the couch, and tossed his son over his knee. Severus was putting up a fight, wriggling and writhing to free himself from his father's grasp, but the man was more than twice his size and what seemed like infinitely stronger. Eileen's screams were still ringing in Severus's ears when his father smacked him hard on the rear.

"Teach you to talk back, boy!" he hollered.

What happened next was unexpected and inexplicable, at least from a Muggle's point of view. The bookshelf that stood behind the couch tipped forward, slowly at first, then came crashing down on Mr. Snape's head. The man bellowed, threw Severus from his knee, and rolled onto the floor, clutching his bleeding crown and cursing.

Severus got to his knees, looked at his mother who rushed forward and knelt by her husband's side, looking from the injured man on the floor to the bookshelf, which had spilled half its contents onto the couch. He didn't make that happen... did he?

Suddenly, Tobias leapt to his feet, shoving Eileen over, and marched toward the front door, shouting expletives about magic and freaks and big mistakes. He stomped into his shoes, stuffed his beefy arms into his coat, and marched out the door, his head pouring blood down the back of his jacket.

It was quiet for a minute before Eileen started to sob quietly. She remained on the floor where her husband had been, curled up into herself and hiding her face from her son. Severus stood, clenching and unclenching his fists, before he went to put away the leftovers from supper and head off to bed.

The next day, his father did not return. Nor the next day. Or the day after that. Eileen had withdrawn into herself, and one day had not bothered getting up out of bed at all. When she finally came out to feed Severus his breakfast one morning, they remained silent until her son was halfway through his meal.

"Um... I was wondering... about when we could go to Diagon Alley. And when we could send the owl to Hogwarts, just to let them know I'm coming."

Eileen made no response but to get up from the table and leave him alone to his food. So Severus finished his eggs, went to slip on his shoes, and headed for Lily's house.

This time he did not have to wait long. Lily came bolting out to meet him almost as soon as he stopped in front of the Evans' home. "Severus, there's something I need to show you—come in, come on!"

Without letting him give another word, he rushed after her into their house. It was only the third time he'd been there; after January, he made it a habit not to come knocking too often. Lily immediately shot up the staircase by the door, and urged him to follow her. He had never been upstairs before. Cautiously, he climbed the stairs after her.

At the top of the staircase, there was a small hallway and three doors. Lily led him into the first doorway. Her room was small but cozy, with a single bed pushed against the wall, a desk, and a chest of drawers in the opposite corner from the only window in the room. With purpose she marched to her desk, swiped a letter off of it, then handed it to Severus. "Look at this."

Severus looked at the front of the letter. Written in lavish green ink was _Petunia Evans_, with her address and exact whereabouts underneath. Severus frowned at it, and flipped the envelope over. Sure enough, the purple wax seal of Hogwarts was there, albeit snapped in half. "Does this mean Tuney's coming to Hogwarts, too?"

"I really don't think so," he said. He highly doubted it, in any case. He hadn't seen a lick of magic from that Muggle in the entire year he'd known her. He was also puzzled as to how she had come to receive a Hogwarts letter. He started to open the envelope and look inside—

"_Don't_!" Lily cried, swiping it out of his hands.

"What? It's already open."

"This is Tuney's letter," she reminded him, wagging the envelope. "We can't go through her things!"

"Don't you want to know what the letter says, though? It could be something important," he countered.

Lily looked wary. She did not want to cross her sister, but she was ever so anxious to see what was in the letter. Petunia was at a sleepover, and she wouldn't be back until the following Monday, which was _so long_ from now. Looking guiltily between the letter and Severus, she handed it back over. "You do it," she said.

Severus continued to pull out the letter. He unfolded it, stood next to Lily, and she read it aloud for the both of them.

_Dear Miss Evans,_

_Thank you for your interest in attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Unfortunately, we cannot grant you admission. Hogwarts is a school for young witches and wizards who possess a degree of certain ability in them. Upon their births, their names are automatically noted in an archive. I regret to inform you that your name is not in this archive. Thus, you do not meet the requirements for the curriculum._

_I am remorseful that you cannot join your sister with us at Hogwarts. However, I offer you my best wishes in your studies closer to home. Your love and support for your sister during her year at Hogwarts would be both highly appreciated by your family and the staff, and most admirable contribution you could make to the spirit of the school._

_Sincerely Yours,_

_Albus Dumbledore_

After reading the letter, Lily looked up at Severus and stared. He only let his eyes linger on the parchment for a little longer before meeting her eyes. Two things struck him: the first sent a pang through his chest, for she had tears in her eyes, making them glitter prettily; the second made his stomach feel funny, for they stood less than a foot apart from each other. He tried to quash the feeling, and sought words to comfort her.

"At least Dumbledore was nice about it," he said. "I didn't think he talked to Muggles."

This, much to his dismay, had the opposite effect he intended. Lily's eyebrows knit together and the glittering in her eyes became flames. "I'm a Muggle," Lily said.

"That's not what I meant," he replied defensively, tightening his grip on his side of the letter. "You're different. You have magic, your sister doesn't. I didn't think Muggles could get in contact with Hogwarts—there must be wizards working undercover in Muggle post or something."

Her anger seemed to ebb and he relaxed. Then she looked at the letter longingly. "I wish Tuney could come with me," she said.

Severus hesitated several times before offering: "I'll be there."

"Yeah," she agreed with a small nod, but somehow it sounded like a poor substitute. She folded the letter carefully and put it back in the envelope. "Mr. Dumbledore does sound pretty nice. He's the headmaster?"

"Yeah. He's done loads of stuff. Like made a Philosopher's Stone, found out how to use dragon's blood, and even defeated a Dark wizard."

"A Dark wizard?"

"Yeah, someone who uses Dark magic. To kill and stuff."

Lily seemed to shudder. "I don't like the sound of that. Are there a lot of Dark wizards?"

"No. Dumbledore scares them off. But Dark wizards are powerful; they're the best at using spells than any other witch or wizard."

She frowned. "Well, if Dumbledore doesn't use Dark magic, and he beat a Dark wizard, he must be tougher."

Severus had nothing to say to this.


	4. The Wizarding World

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing. _

_Additional Note: Part of this chapter contains dialogue as found in _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, _by J.K. Rowling, Raincoast Books, 2007 pp. 538-9_

Chapter Four: The Wizarding World

In the end, Severus and Lily did not end up going to Diagon Alley together. When the Evanses received no reply from Mrs. Snape and her son, they found their own means of reaching the wizarding commercial district. Severus found this out around mid August, and with a pang of disappointment, only went with his mother.

Eileen Snape only had a small amount of inheritance money left over, but was only able to buy her son some decent supplies and wear for the school year; over half of what he had to use was handed down. It was a great day for Severus, for he had never been lavished upon with such luxuries before. When he asked if he could have a broom as well, however, the dream ended. She gave him her brooding silent treatment, and no more wondrous things were purchased.

When they returned to the Muggle world, they were once again poor and alone. Tobias Snape never returned home. Severus accepted it as plain (and somewhat delightful) truth, but Mrs. Snape was far more distraught over this news. Severus asked her: You have more wizard money than we had Muggle money—why not move away? She never gave him an answer, and it was years before he understood, but she never would move away. Instead, a week before Severus was supposed to be off to Hogwarts, she got a job in the tea parlour he and Lily had frequented in the winter, just to cover living expenses. They still had to try and pawn off a lot of their old things to buy food.

The day came that Eileen woke up her son and told him to get ready. "Your train leaves at eleven—hurry." He had so many butterflies in his stomach he may as well have been floating.

He had never been to King's Cross Station, so the sight of it was enough to leave him in awe for weeks. He never thought so many people could be in one place at one time, and that that place could be so _huge._ Eileen had told him that the entrance to the platform was hidden in the barrier between two platforms, so each barrier they passed, he watched after longingly, wondering which one would hold the gate to his new life. Finally, Eileen steered her son toward platforms 9 and 10, and Severus was beside himself in delight.

"Slowly now," she warned unenthusiastically. They strolled forward to the barrier, trying not to direct attention to themselves, but Severus was becoming increasingly nervous. As they closed in on the barrier, he took a short jog at it, shoving his trolley forward. Before he noticed the transition, he had passed through to Platform 9¾, and his trolley continued to carry forward with the force he had put behind it. He desperately struggled to slow down before he struck the barrier opposite the entrance.

When he looked behind him, he smiled to see the wrought iron archway that read _Platform Nine and Three Quarters_. Finally—he was here. When he looked back at his mother, his smile faltered, for the sour frown that had been permanently set in her face since his father left was enough to make him feel a bit guilty for being happy.

She led him along the platform where the grand scarlet train sat, steam billowing from the stack on the engine car, with hundreds of students scattered along its length, bidding farewell to their families and greeting friends after a long summer apart. Immediately his eyes wracked the platform for a glimpse of dark red hair—any sight of Lily. Halfway down the platform, after weaving through a dense crowd of extremely excited fourth year girls, he spotted Lily, her sister Petunia, and Mr. and Mrs. Evans.

He halted immediately, and with a bit of confusion and annoyance, his mother stopped with him. Lily and Petunia were standing a bit apart from their parents, having an apparently heated discussion. Lily grabbed for her sister's hand, but after a few words exchanged, the older girl tugged it away defiantly. Severus heard something along the lines of "nosey wizards," and with that, Petunia tore away from Lily and hid behind her mother's skirts, trying to hide from her sister, whom now had tears in her eyes.

"Come along," Eileen said shortly after watching the scene herself. She did not know that the red-headed girl was the one Severus had grown so close to over the better part of the year. He decided not to divulge this information with her.

After she had seen his things on the train, and the second warning whistle had blasted, Eileen offered her son a nod while patting down the front of his coat. "Change before you get there."

"I will."

With another nod, and a twitch of her lips which made her frown deepen, Mrs. Snape walked away and headed back to the entrance of Platform 9¾. Severus watched her go with something vague gnawing at the pit of his stomach. Why hadn't she said goodbye? They had never had the need to before, and so he couldn't quite comprehend the feeling he was missing out on something important.

He boarded the train, sat down in a semi-empty compartment (another boy was there with a giddy grin plastered on his face and a silent nature about him) and waited for the train to leave. When it started to crawl along the tracks, he could see and hear students leaning out the windows and calling their final goodbyes to their families. Even the silent boy leaned out his window to wave vigorously at a pleasantly plump witch. Severus remained in his seat and watched all the families pass him by, waving and smiling, and pretended that some of them were doing it for him.

After the station had been left behind and rolling hills surrounded them, Severus eagerly changed into his new wizard's robes. Suddenly, he was transformed. No longer was he the boy in the dirty smock, the short jeans, the large jacket—he was now a respectable Hogwarts student. Severus spent the better part of ten minutes simply moving his limbs around and relishing in the feel of the cotton and satin against his skin. He felt he was decked in lavish finery.

He wasted no time searching for Lily next; through the hustle and bustle on the platform, he did not get the chance to talk to her. He looked into every compartment as he passed, some curious faces glancing at him as he all but pressed his face against the glass. Compartment after compartment he went, becoming increasingly aggravated the longer he did not find Lily. Finally, at the very end of the cab, he found her in the last room. There were some boys in there already, chatting idly and not paying her much attention. She was leaning up against the window, hiding her face from view.

Severus slid open the door and sat down opposite Lily. She gave him the slightest of glances before staring out the window again. Her eyes were pink from crying.

"I don't want to talk to you," she said, her voice strained.

"Why not?"

"Tuney h—hates me. Because we saw that letter from Dumbledore."

He thought of the soft envelope and the glittering ink, and how he had convinced Lily they should read it. "So what?" he said, instead of searching for comforting words.

Lily's eyes narrowed and her lower jaw stuck out slightly—that was how she always looked when Severus said something stupid and insulting. "So she's my sister!" she huffed.

"She's only a—" Severus cut himself off quickly, remembering her birthday. Speaking of Muggles derogatorily had not gone over well in the slightest. Lily wiped at her eyes and did not test him on what he was about to say.

"But we're going!" he added hopefully, all his pent up excitement from his entire childhood gushing in his voice. "This is it! We're off to Hogwarts!"

Despite still looking miserable about her sister, she offered a small smile, nodding while giving another wipe at her eyes. Severus felt small relief at seeing her cheer, if only a little.

"You'd better be in Slytherin," he added with zest. He knew he was going to Slytherin—his mother had told him that all the Princes, back and back, had been in Slytherin, except for a few bad eggs. They were resourceful and cunning, he'd been told. Lily was pretty smart, and he thought that meant the same as cunning, so they must be Sorted into the same house together.

"Slytherin?" she repeated, and just as Severus was about to explain to her how he thought she fit in to the house, one of the other boys in the compartment turned and snorted.

"Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" The boy turned to his companion, who was sprawled out on the seat opposite.

"My whole family have been in Slytherin," he replied, sounding somewhat morose.

"Blimey," the first said, "and I thought you seemed all right!" To this the second grinned.

"Maybe I'll break the tradition. Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?"

The boy threw up his hand, pretending to clutch something. "_Gryffindor_, _where dwell the brave at heart_! Like my dad."

Severus scoffed quietly like he just had the misfortune of stepping on something unpleasant. The first boy, sitting next to Severus, turned and glared. "Got a problem with that?"

"No," he decried, his lip curling. "If you'd rather be brawny than brainy—"

"Where're you hoping to go, seeing as you're neither?" the second boy added harshly, still stretched out over the seat like he owned the compartment. The first boy guffawed with more gusto than seemed necessary. Lily burst up from her seat, utter disapproval bordering on contempt on her face as she looked between the two boys.

"Come on, Severus, let's find another compartment."

"Oooooo..."

The two boys mocked her as she passed, and the first attempted to trip Severus as he followed.

"See ya, Snivellus!" one of them shouted as he slid the door shut behind him. Severus stuck his face close to the window to find out which one of them did it, but Lily grabbed him by the arm and led him along. "Just ignore them," she said.

"Stupid... arrogant..." Severus started to mutter a few choice words, which made Lily tug on his sleeve and shake her head disapprovingly.

They found themselves a semi-quiet compartment in which a gaggle of Ravenclaw girls entering their sixth year were enjoying their new textbooks. Lily had Severus run through the process of arriving at Hogwarts several times, asking for minute details and fawning over the possibilities. She asked about all the other houses, about the history of each one, and then asked about the past of the school in general. Severus shared all he knew, occasionally pulling information out of the air when he wasn't quite sure on the answer. They munched on a few Pumpkin Pastilles, Liquorice Wands and Chocolate Frogs, and the two collected Bertie Bott and Cercie cards. Her sister long forgotten, and the two boys no longer a lingering concern for him, the two were able to enjoy the rest of their trip through Scotland.

When the train finally came to a halt at their destination, Severus and Lily stuck side by side, not wishing to leave the other in this strange and unfamiliar place. As soon as they clambered off the car, a booming voice echoed over their heads, making the two friends jump.

"Firs' years, to me!" the voice bellowed. They searched for the source, but neither had to look long. A gigantic man, at least twice as tall as any ordinary person (and who knows how much wider), was standing on the other side of the platform, holding a lantern. The last thing any of the first years seemed to want to do was go over to a giant who could squash them like Flobberworms, but Lily beckoned Severus forward after a few moments consideration.

"No one would hurt us at Hogwarts. You said that yourself, remember?" she said. "Come on. He doesn't look so bad."

Severus followed after her eagerly, trying to put a spring in his step to convince her he wasn't in the least bit afraid of a giant. About one hundred children surrounded the big man, most looking up fearfully at him. He was wearing clothes made from an assortment of skins, and his large boots were covered in fur, making them appear as small bears. He had long, bushy black hair and a matching beard, but despite his rough appearance his beetle black eyes twinkled as he smiled at all of them. The large man looked around himself, then said: "Righ', this should be the lot of yer. Follow me—to the boats. Come, now."

They all scuttled behind him like little hatchlings following their mother, all the way down to the shore of the lake. The moon was waxing, nearly full, and it lit up part of the water like it was full of shining gems. The other part of it was still, black, and haunting. His mother had once told Severus that a giant squid lived in this lake, and Severus had to repress a shiver as to not look fearful beside Lily.

"Look at that," she said wondrously, pointing up at the castle which loomed over the lake. Severus looked up with her, and pretended not to be as surprised as her. If King's Cross Station had left him in awe, Hogwarts Castle left him breathless. Lights glinted out the windows of each tower, of which were silhouetted against the starry sky; it stood at the top of a foothill, and behind it towered a mountain, making the castle appear formidable and elegant. Its stone walls looked to be made of the moon itself, for it glowed just as brightly. He had seen a picture once, but it did not do Hogwarts justice.

The giant man led them in pairs into the small boats which dotted the shoreline. Lily and Severus, of course, got into the same one, refusing to be split apart. Almost as soon as they sat down, the boat began to glide across the surface of the lake on its own accord. Lily gasped, clutching the side, watching the lake with wide eyes.

"Don't worry, it's enchanted to take us across the lake," Severus said, but he too had felt a small jolt of panic as the boat set off. She nodded and loosened her grip on the boat but did not let go of it.

After a twenty minute ride, their boats glided through a large outcrop and through a veil of ivy. It finally came to a stop in an underground harbour. Lily climbed out tentatively, but after considering the boat as Severus climbed out, a wide smile spread across her face. "That was actually quite fun," she said. "Do we do that every year?"

He shook his head. "Just the first time."

"Oh, well. I wonder what we get to do next year?"

The giant man led the troupe of children up a path towards the school. The pair joined the masses and climbed the steps that eventually led them to a pair of grand double doors, where a stern looking witch wearing square frames stood. Her jet black hair was pulled tightly into a bun, and her tall hat was so pointed it looked to be lethal. "Thank you, Hagrid, I shall take them from here."

"Professor," the giant said, tipped an invisible hat, and walked from the room, his footsteps shaking the marble floor beneath them.

"If you will follow me," the witch said promptly, turning and leading the group down the hall towards another pair of double doors.

Lily turned to Severus as they followed her. "She doesn't seem very nice," she said.

Severus shrugged. "Teachers don't need to be."

The witch pushed open the doors, which creaked and groaned ominously. Inside were hundreds of people sitting at four long tables, with what looked like at least one candle for each person floating in midair; the ceiling looked like it blended in with the sky, and shooting stars streaked across it. Both Lily and Severus let their jaws drop.

The first years were herded forward to the front table, where all the teachers sat. They all lined up in front of it, and as they scanned the table to get a look at all the teachers, Lily waved excitedly behind Severus. A man with a great bushy white moustache waved back. Then the stern witch stepped in front of them, suddenly holding a stool and a very old hat. Severus tapped Lily on the arm. "That's it, that's the Sorting Hat."

Lily watched on with the utmost anticipation as the woman set down the three-legged stool and plopped the hat on top of it. Then, without much warning, a mouth appeared on its front, and it began to belt out a song.

_Another year, of which we begin_

_On September the first at Hogwarts._

_While this be your first, this shan't be my last_

_For I have Sorted for centuries past._

_For those who may know, though many would not_

_This school was founded on friendships four,_

_And while their deeds were most distraught_

_They happened many a year before._

_For on this cool night, one millennia ago,_

_The very first Sorting was I intended for._

_Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Slytherin, Gryffindor:_

_A thousand years running, to a thousand year more!_

_To the first, fair Rowena, the cleverest of all,_

_Who sought right from wrong and prized the wise,_

_House Ravenclaw did Hogwarts befall_

_And forever unto knowledge reprise._

_And to Humble Helga, more fair and just_

_Than all the rest, we praise her humility_

_For without her virtue, Hogwarts must_

_But resign to pride and forfeit tranquillity._

_Salazar, to ambition we owe,_

_He stove for glory, success, and gold,_

_Without his zeal and without his flow,_

_Surely Hogwarts would have since gone cold._

_Not forgotten is audacious Godric,_

_Who stood out amongst the rest,_

_For with fortitude and perseverance_

_Did this wizard Hogwarts attest._

_Though these noble witches and wizards_

_Did all their best for all of the rest,_

_Their friendships did deny a certain_

_Quality of seeing eye to eye._

_Torn apart, leaving all aghast,_

_The spirit of Hogwarts remained._

_All their values and hopes and dreams_

_Live on through their houses, for all to see._

_Though I be old, worn and torn, I'm far from_

_Done my calling. When I am through with you_

_(Or you are through with me) you will see that_

_Hogwarts is, quite clearly, all enduring!_

A burst of applause followed the hat's recital. Lily turned to Severus. "You never told me it could do _that_," she exclaimed.

"I'm sure I did," he replied, but in actuality he had no idea it _could_ sing songs.

The witch unfurled a roll of parchment and began to speak before the applause died down. "When I call your name, step forward to be Sorted," she instructed, then read the name: "Adams, Jerry!"

Severus was barely listening to all the names listed off. His mind was buzzing, eagerly awaiting Lily's name to be called, for she would be Sorted long before he was. Short ways down the list, however, the name "Black, Sirius" was called, which Severus only caught interest in because of the individual who climbed on top of the stool to have the Hat dropped on his head. It was the indolent boy who participated in mocking him and Lily on the train earlier that day. He narrowed his eyes and hoped the Hat would give him a good munch on the head.

"Gryffindor!" the Hat bellowed. With a small, satisfied smirk, the boy clambered off the stool and strut over to the cheering Gryffindor table. Severus sneered.

An assortment of names were called after that, including a Callingsworth and a Deidrick, which sounded vaguely familiar to Severus, but not noteworthy enough to dwell on for long, for shortly "Evans, Lily" was called for.

Lily gave Severus a nervous smile before weaving her way through the crowd to the front, her knees trembling. She gave the black haired witch an uncertain smile before seating herself on the stool. Severus crossed his fingers and held his breath as the Hat was lowered on to her head...

"Gryffindor!" the Hat said once more. Severus let go of his breath in a disappointed groan. Now grinning from ear to ear, Lily handed back the Hat, then slid off the stool and made her way to Gryffindor table, which was roaring with approval. On her way, she gave Severus one of her "Don't worry" smiles, which she usually offered whenever he griped or groaned about something he was apprehensive about. When she sat down on the edge of the bench, the Sirius boy shuffled over for her. Upon looking at his face, she slowly turned her back on him, crossed her arms, and glowered. This, at least, served to lighten Severus's spirits.

It took twenty more minutes for the rest of the first years to be Sorted. The other rude boy from the train, named James Potter (Severus clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes, committing the name to memory) was put into the same house as Lily. He sat on the opposite side of her from Sirius, and she stared at the table, seemingly intent on not looking at either one of them. Someone by the name of Simmons was called just before Severus; when the severe-looking witch called his name, he flinched, having nearly forgotten what he was doing there.

The excitement of being Sorted had tragically worn off once Lily had been placed in his rival house. He knew without a doubt he'd be in Slytherin, and already he was running through scenarios in his head about how she would denounce his friendship within a fortnight. He lowered himself onto the stool, and before the hat had touched the tops of his ears, the Hat shouted for the entire hall to hear: "Slytherin!"

A small grin spread across his lips, but still the effect of being Sorted had been significantly dimmed. He slid off the stool and strode over the Slytherin's table, which was clapping for him politely as he sat. A tall boy, much older than he, with long, straight, platinum blonde hair patted him on the back and gave a slim smile, which would have been friendly had not his face been waxen, sharp and gaunt.

After the last student (one Odessa Zabini) had been called and Sorted into Severus's house, the man he recognized as Dumbledore stood from the head of the table and smiled down at them. He had long silvery hair that cascaded down his back, and a beard that nearly touched his belt. His midnight blue robes were billowing and flowing, and a bit of a train ran across the floor behind him. Dumbledore placed his hands on either side of his dinner set, and everyone fell silent instantaneously.

"Welcome, first years! Not only do you begin your journey as new students this night, but I as well begin a new career as Headmaster. I do believe it shall be quite the bumpy, thrilling ride. Alas, I do not wish to keep your hungry bellies from their meals much longer. Before we begin, I wish to impart with you this wisdom: _Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus__. _And with that, let the Feast begin!"

Dumbledore clapped his hands and spread them in a wide arc, and suddenly food appeared on all the gold platters and plates on each of the tables. There was a chorus of delight from all the first years, and then everyone dug in to their meals. Severus was stunned beyond comprehension; he had never seen so much food in his life, and everything that was set before him made Mrs. Evan's dinner look like a peasant's supper. The boy next to him scooped out some baked yams and then handed the ladle to Severus, who took it with a bit of wonderment still lingering on his face.

"Made by all the house-elves here. It's not half bad, but ours have made much better." He offered his hand when Severus was done dishing out his plate. "Lucius Malfoy."

"Severus. Snape," he replied hesitantly. He could count on one hand how many times he had traded introductions with someone like this.

"Good to have you on the right side," Lucius said, throwing a glance over the hall before cutting a piece of pork and delicately placing it on his tongue.

After the meal was finished, Dumbledore stood again, and motioned for quiet. "Your classes will begin tomorrow; timetables will be distributed by your Heads of house tomorrow morning during breakfast. Please note that there are two particular areas of interest you would be wise to keep clear of: the Forbidden Forest, which lies on the outskirts of the grounds (and is named as such for a reason), and a newly planted willow tree, which has a meaner bite than its bark. Oho! Excuse me. While not quite full grown, the Whomping Willow is still dangerous; it is planted in the middle of the grounds, in between the Black Lake and the Castle. You have been warned.

"I now ask the Prefects to please lead your first years to their dormitories. Off to bed with you, quicker snapper!"

The entirety of the Great Hall rose at once, and all the students began to clamber to the great double doors. As Severus followed Lucius in the line he had formed of eleven year-olds, Severus wondered what the Whomping Willow was. That was one thing his mother definitely did _not_ tell him about, and not for lack of memory—she had told him about everything else in varying detail over the years, and not once about the tree. It must have been a new addition in the last few years.

As they left the Great Hall, Severus searched desperately for Lily, but could not spot her dark red hair amongst the herd of hundreds of children. Instead he was whisked away to the dungeons and into the Slytherin Common Room (to which entry was given to the password "E Plurubus Unum") which was richly decorated but somehow a little off-putting. Lucius directed the boys to their dormitories, which was down a winding staircase, deeper into the dungeon. Severus's room was with three other boys; their room was a sizable square, with Slytherin crests adorning the walls and cozy looking four posters angled from each corner. In the centre of the room was a small pool, and the water seemed to emit a faint aquiline glow. Their trunks and things were placed at the foot of each bed.

"Sleep well, gentlemen," Lucius said, bidding them goodnight. The three other boys chatted excitedly as they all changed into their pyjamas. Through conversation, Severus learned that their names were Dunsen, Gallagher, and Richier. He was wary of talking to them, since talking usually was what lost him friends, but he hoped that before long he would be chummy with his new roommates.

Severus lay down, pull the covers over his head, and tried to go to sleep. With a great, heaving sigh, he wished desperately that Lily would stay his friend after this, and closed his eyes.


	5. The Slytherins and the Gryffindors

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing._

Chapter Five: The Slytherins and the Gryffindors

The first day of school for Severus Snape had been nothing short of disastrous. On the bright side, he found out that Lily and he would be in two different classes together: Herbology and Potions. On the down side, his two quickly formed rivals would also be in the same classes—Sirius Black and James Potter.

Each day resulted in a different schedule, and on Thursday, September the second, Herbology came first. He shovelled his breakfast down his throat with difficulty, worms squirming around in the pit of his stomach, before he headed off with a group of other Slytherin first years to the greenhouses.

There were about forty of them huddled together outside, in which Professor Sprout had directed them. Severus found Lily quickly and fell into step beside her (a few Slytherins gave Severus dirty looks). She lit up at the sight of him. "Severus! How is your dormitory? Mine's fabulous—we're all in circular rooms with four poster beds and red drapes—I room with another Muggle-born girl, her name's Mary Macdonald—"

Lily was starting to sound like her out-of-control, energetic mother. Severus did not get a chance to put a word in before Professor Sprout stood before them and waved, getting their attention for quiet. She was a stout woman with frizzy black hair peppered with grey. Her tiny brown eyes were like buttons and her stubbed nose was round and small, making her look like an exaggerated baby doll. "Welcome to your first ever class. If my words whizzed over your head earlier, I will remind you that I am Professor Sprout, and you are in first year Herbology class. Sometimes I have little sprites who misread their timetables, so make sure to triple check them before we begin."

With that, a disgruntled boy at the back of the crowd moaned with worry and sprinted back towards the castle. Some of the Slytherins laughed as he went, as well as James and Sirius.

"Well now, never mind that," she said with a dismissive wave of her hand, "the rest of you have the syllabus, so I need not describe what we will be studying this year or safety expectations—you can read those for yourself as an assignment." There was a bit of groaning, but Lily was positively brimming, and she idly flipped through the pages of the syllabus as if she couldn't wait to read it all. "Our first lesson will not be in the greenhouses, but along the edge of the Forbidden Forest. You may recall that it is advised you do not to enter the forest, and for good reason. What we will be looking for is hopefully still growing just inside the limits. First things first, by a raise of hands—how many of you have cracked open the textbook?"

Only a few students raised their hands, Lily included.

"Well, better turn out than last year. And how many of _you_ few know what Aconitum is?"

Everyone put their hands down.

"Not to worry, not to worry. Aconitum will be our first plant of study. We may be lucky if we find any today, but if we do, we will begin to learn the names of the three most common species, how to identify them, and learn what they are best used for. Now, first and foremost to note—this plant is extremely toxic! Do not touch or attempt to consume anything we may find in the Forest, or you'll be too far away for Madam Pomfrey to save. Right, off we go!"

The Professor led them out across the dewy lawn, and they followed like a herd of sheep. Although over fifty feet away, all the students turned to stare at the Whomping Willow, as if to make sure it stayed where it was and did not come to attack them. Far away, it looked like a normal tree, and Severus found it hard to believe it would attack people. Furthermore, he found it difficult to believe Professor Dumbledore would plant a tree that could deliberately hurt people. As a new Headmaster, he was certainly turning out to be extraordinary. And not in a good way.

When they reached the edge of the forest, Professor Sprout brought them to a halt. "We'll be searching the immediate area for some Aconitum. The plant will be small and leafy, with either a blue or yellow tinge to the ends of the leaves. It will look quite peculiar, as the leaves tend to form globes when it matures. Now, everyone form pairs—don't be shy, work with the person next to you—right, now when you find a plant, raise your hand and call for me. _Do not leave sight of that hut_!" She pointed purposefully at the small stone hut sitting behind her on the edge of the forest. "If you can't see the Gamekeeper's house, you've gone too far. Right, now, off with you!"

No one moved for a good five seconds before Professor Sprout waved her hands about and charged through the group like a dog herding sheep. Students quickly formed pairs with the nearest body and scuttled into the trees, of which the Headmaster had told them the night before not to cross. Lily seemed quite nervous about going in as well.

"I don't know, Severus—what if something's in there?"

"No one would hurt us at Hogwarts, right?" he reminded her. Still not utterly convinced, she nodded and followed closely behind him through the trees. This made him swell a bit, and a satisfied grin pulled at his lips.

After a few minutes, Lily relaxed ("This forest doesn't look so scary," she informed Severus stoutly) and helped Severus on the search for Aconitum. They mostly shuffled around, poking plants with their shoes and inspecting them. What seemed like a fruitless search became very exciting twenty minutes later. A boy on the other side of the site hollered excitedly for Professor Sprout, jumping up and down in the air with his hand raised.

After Professor Sprout inspected the boy's findings, she waved her hand through the air. "Everyone, to me!" When the students gathered around, she pulled a plant from the forest floor. "This," she said, showing it to everyone, "is monkshood. It is a type of Aconitum which is used in a powerful potion. I'll have you get out your parchments and write down notes on its appearance, where we found it, and other things you may have noticed about the plant. Then we'll continue looking!"

So the students drew their writing materials, bent over the small bush of plants, and began to take notes, whispering to each other once in a while for hints and tips. Severus's writing without support was a bit sloppy, and his hand was jittery because he was nervous. Once he wrote most of his notes, he went over them; he could not read what he wrote.

At one point he was aware of someone sniggering behind him, but he didn't register it until someone pulled back the neck of his robes and dumped something inside. His first reaction was to reach behind him and feel whose hand was there; then he stood and turned to see Sirius grinning like a goon and stepping away from him, James laughing in the background. The next thing he noticed was an intense burning down his back, white hot and blistering.

He hollered, dancing around and trying to shake out whatever was in there. Everyone had stopped what they were doing to see what the disturbance was, all the while Sirius and James sniggered like hyenas. The trail of fire down Severus's back became more intense and so unbearable that his knees buckled and he rolled around on the ground, trying to put out the burning, but it only made it worse.

How much time had passed was unknown to Severus; eventually someone had come up to him, cast some sort of incantation, and what was making him burn had suddenly gone. Next thing he knew Professor Sprout was bending over him but looking over her shoulder at the two boys who had attacked him. Their mirth had melted off their faces and fear had taken its place.

"Gentlemen," she said, her voice saturated with anger, "do you not understand the meaning of 'toxic'?"

There was a pause before James replied: "You just said don't try to eat—"

"CASTLE, NOW!" she boomed. Severus's back was still on fire, and he fought with every fibre of his will power not to let tears come to his eyes. He squirmed weakly against the pain. Everyone was shocked, their mouths hanging open and their quills dripping excess ink onto their parchments. Finally the boys skittered forward nervously as Professor Sprout helped Severus to his feet and started towards the grounds. "Everyone stay put until I return," she instructed, holding Severus around the shoulders. As they passed Lily, he shrugged his instructor's arm off stubbornly, though found it harder to walk once he was unsupported.

James and Sirius walked stiffly ten paces ahead of them. When they got to the castle, the two boys waited obediently for Professor Sprout to give them instructions. She led them down the corridor and towards one of the first doors they came across. The professor bid them to sit in the office, to not move another muscle (or expect certain expulsion) and await the arrival of Professor McGonagall, head of Gryffindor House. Then she left them behind, leading Severus further along the first floor to the hospital wing.

She opened the door to a long room with beds lining the walls. Further down along the right-hand side was a boy sitting on one of the beds. He looked up at them expectantly, his sandy brown hair falling in his eyes. Severus took interest in the stranger, but Professor Sprout continued as if she hadn't seen him there. "Madam Pomfrey? Madam Pomfrey, I have a student here for you."

A woman wearing an immaculate white cap and apron came out of an office in the back corner of the infirmary. Her eyes were wide with disbelief as she marched towards Professor Sprout and Severus. "It's not even been an_ hour_, Pomona."

"Monkshood dumped down the back of his robes. The culprits are being held in Minerva's office."

A look crossed Madam Pomfrey's face that even Severus could read as foreboding. He could tell Sirius and James would be in _serious_ trouble. "All right, this won't take a moment, sir," Madam Pomfrey said, leading Severus to one of the beds. She drew the curtain, blocking the other boy and Professor Sprout from view. "Lift up your robes, please," she said, reaching into the front pocket of her apron.

This made him highly uncomfortable, but he did as he was bid. She then rubbed an ointment over his back, and immediately the dull burning that remained was replaced with a pleasant cooling sensation. "There you are, all set." He dropped his robes and she threw back the curtain. "I'll keep him here for the rest of the morning, just to make sure the burns clear."

Professor Sprout nodded, then turned to leave. "Professor, I'd advise you to make sure your students not play with fire from now on."

"Thank you, Madam Pomfrey," Professor Sprout said, but she didn't sound thankful at all. When she left the room, his caretaker bid him lay back.

"You just relax, now, dear," she said soothingly.

"I don't want to relax," Severus protested, his eyes flickering to the other boy. "I want to go to my classes." At this the soft smile on Madam Pomfrey's face fell, and hints of disapproval started to take its place.

"Now you listen here, young man," she said, pointing a stiff finger at him, "my job is to see my patients taken care of and mended quickly. Now I will not have you flying about this castle making more of a mess for yourself, otherwise you'll miss _more_ classes and you'll have to come straight back here. The longer you stay put, the better for you _and_ me."

Severus scowled, but did as he was told, albeit huffing about it and folding his arms across his chest defiantly. She left him there on the bed and swept away into her office again. There was a palpable silence, and suddenly Severus did not have the courage to look at the other boy across the room. He kept his eyes determinedly pointed at the floor beside his bed.

"First day not going well?" the boy finally asked after several minutes of quiet.

Severus shot his eyes at the boy with disdain, insulted by the suggestion, though true it was. He did not offer an answer.

"I was hoping to be in class, too, but... I guess I should be grateful I could come to Hogwarts at all." The boy drifted off, trying to cut off his own words at the end of his sentence, but Severus caught them and looked up expectantly.

"Why? Why would you be lucky to come?" he asked.

It was the boy who pointed his eyes deftly at the floor. "I get sick a lot. My parents weren't keen on letting me go to a boarding school, but the Headmaster convinced them I would be okay here."

"Oh." Severus looked around the room, wanting to pry but not knowing what it was he wanted to ask. Finally: "Is it contagious, or something?"

The boy gave a hollow, dour laugh. "Not really."

"Not really? That doesn't make sense. Either it is or it isn't."

The boy shrugged. "Whenever it gets bad, I just avoid other people."

"But you're obviously sick now," Severus said, "you're in the hospital wing. What if I catch whatever you have?"

The boy smiled sadly. "I promise you won't get sick."

Before Severus could ask any more questions, Madam Pomfrey emerged from her office again, huffing a sigh and looking upon the boy. "All right, all set, off you go," she said to the boy. "First classes should be over soon; head straight to your second period class."

Severus frowned—the boy had just finished telling him that he was sick and missing his first class, and without so much as a check-up, the nurse let him go out to his class to infect other students. The boy got up from his bed, gave Severus a small smile and a nod, and left the hospital wing. Severus watched him go with a mixture of longing and jealousy.

"Do I have to stay?" Severus asked.

Madam Pomfrey gave him a pointed look and went back into her office without another word.

The rest of the morning passed him by ever so slowly, and soon he had missed the end of his Herbology lesson _and_ his first Transfiguration class. At least in the afternoon he would get to go to Charms, but Lily would not be in his class this time.

When lunch came, Madam Pomfrey stood by his bed and asked to check his back. Once she had her inspection, she nodded her head toward the door. "You may go."

Despite his new freedom, Severus was gloomy, and acted a bit more of a crabby child than he meant to as he stomped out of the infirmary to the Great Hall. When he sat down at the lunch table, the fact he did not spot a glimpse of either James or Sirius brightened him—perhaps they were being expelled at this very moment...

Severus purposefully isolated himself a bit as he sat down at an empty part of the Slytherin table and started to dish himself a hefty helping of miniature Yorkshire puddings and mutton. Suddenly someone was at his side, and he was intent on ignoring this person until he realized who it was.

"Are you all right?" Lily asked, looking down at him with wild, concerned eyes. "What did they do to you? Are you hurt bad?"

Severus felt a tinge of annoyance; of course he was okay: it would take more than those two gits to hurt him. He shrugged petulantly and snapped: "No."

Lily took a step back from his unexpected ferocity, but decided to stick by her friend, no matter how grumpy he seemed to be. "Are they in big trouble? They weren't in my Charms class after Herbology."

"I think so," said Severus, looking up at her. He then noticed that several Slytherins down the table were sneering in his and Lily's direction. "I mean, I hope so."

"Can I sit?" she asked, patting the bench next to him. Immediately two boys further down leapt up, eyeing her with contempt. Severus glanced between them and her.

"You'd better not," he said warningly.

She blinked.

"I just mean—those—"

"You promised not to leave me here," she said quietly, obviously stung.

"I'm not! I won't! Listen—"

But she would have none of his imploring. Lily walked past Severus, rounded the table, and headed for her own on the other side of the Hall. Severus watched her go with a growing vexation eating away at the pit of his stomach. Today was not going well for him; Hogwarts was turning out not to be any better for him than home was, despite the fact that Lily was there as well. One of the boys who had looked affronted at Lily's presence approached Severus. He looked like he was in his sixth or seventh year.

"Is that girl a friend of yours?" the boy asked.

Severus decided it was best not to tell the truth in this situation, but he could not bring himself to deny her, so he remained quiet, practically shrinking in the teen's shadow.

"Listen—house tables are house tables, we don't mix and mingle," he warned, his expression suggesting Severus should take that knowledge with the utmost seriousness. "Tell her next time she'd better not cross this side of the Hall. Got it?"

Severus could only muster a tiny nod. The boy stalked off, and Severus stared into his plate, unable to recall his appetite. He pursed his lips and exhaled through his nose like a raging bull. He suddenly wanted to make someone else have a worse day than he was having.

Charms was rather uneventful and boring—Severus didn't get to hold his new wand in that class, either. Instead, they went over the syllabus and discussed the theory and basis of charmwork. Then class was dismissed, and shortly after that was dinner in the Great Hall.

In the end, James and Sirius did not get into big trouble. They were both present at the Gryffindor table, and were close enough to the double doors that they noticed Severus entering and made obvious remarks about him. Before Severus headed off for the Slytherin table, he caught a glimpse of Lily talking to a boy—the same sick boy who had sat with him in the hospital wing that afternoon.

He stopped and stared, mouth falling open. He had to warn her! What if she got sick, too? "Not really" meant there was a chance she could get sick, too. But underneath that worry, he felt a pang of jealousy, so minute that he only barely registered it: he was jealous that this boy got to talk to Lily while he had to shuffle away to the other side of the Hall. _House tables are house tables, we don't mix and mingle_. Severus threw this idea out the window and marched over to where the two sat.

By the time he stood behind Lily, half the Gryffindor table was eyeing Severus dangerously, throwing daggers and flames and the like in his direction. Lily was one of the last to realize he was standing behind her, fists balled, lips drawn across his face. "Severus," she said, feigned joy in her voice. He could see from the look in her eyes that she was not prepared to talk to him yet, not after the lunch fiasco. But Severus would not leave until she was warned about who she was mingling with.

"He's sick, Lily," Severus said in a low voice.

Immediately the strange boy's face fell. Lily's eyebrows knitted together, a look that told Severus he was treading a fine line between concern and anger. "What?" she said.

"He was in the infirmary with me this morning," he replied, desperately trying to remain steadfast as his confidence slowly slipped through his fingers. "He told me he gets sick and that it's kind of contagious."

Lily's brows tightened together, and a disapproving look crossed her features. The boy ducked his head. A few Gryffindors sitting nearby started to mutter under their breath as Lily rose from the table.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" she said, her voice sharp. "Today you've been nothing but... _mean_! For your information, this is Remus, and he's not contagious!"

Any semblance of courage Serverus had had evaporated as Lily crossed her arms over her chest and glowered. A few people at the Gryffindor table stood and mimicked the young girl—James and Sirius included.

"Just leave me alone, Severus, I don't want to talk to you right now." She promptly turned and sat down, turning her back on him the way she had to Sirius.

"You'd better go, Snivellus," Sirius said, "before we have to make you."

At this point, Severus wished he had at least learned to do something threatening with his wand that day. But before he could come up with a comeback, Lily shot her eyes over to her fellow Gryffindor. "You leave him alone!" she shouted, drawing the attention of half the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw tables.

Sirius laughed. "Got your girlfriend to defend you, huh?"

"Stop it!" she bit back.

Deciding he would only receive more humiliation if he stayed, Severus stormed off as quickly as he could, his fists clenched, his teeth bared. When would he learn to keep his big mouth shut? And her defending him like that... it looked worse when a girl stood up for a boy. He felt anger bubbling in his chest over what she did...

... but that night as he lay down to sleep, remorse and frustration took its place. She was only trying to look out for him like he'd been trying to look out for her. And he should have known by now that whenever he opened his mouth, something else besides what he'd intended to say came out. He lost count of how many times he had offended Lily just by speaking. Now all he had to show for trying to stick up for her was shame. He hoped that in Potions the next day he wouldn't have to talk to her.

After breakfast the next morning, Severus walked back down into the dungeons and entered the Potions classroom. His first thought was that he immediately liked the place; the second was that, by the look of the set up and the ingredients lying about, he would be able to pick up this subject easily.

The instructor for the class was none other than Professor Slughorn, the man who had come to Lily's house to tell her about Hogwarts. Severus spotted her dark red hair—she was sitting right up front at one of the stone slabs, smiling uncontrollably at the professor. Severus moved to the opposite end of the room and sat himself down at an empty table.

Once the class had arrived and settled, the professor began the lesson by reading off the roster and starting to learn everyone's names. He had each individual say something about their interests or talents and offered warm smiles to everyone when they divulged. When he crossed Lily's name, they had a short conversation, in which following the professor explained he had met Lily over the summer. When the professor called upon Lupin, Remus, there was no reply; the sick boy was not in class today.

After everyone had been quickly introduced, the professor launched into his first lesson. "My name is Professor Horace Slughorn, and I am the Potions Master at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, where you will learn that the science of solutions and concoctions is not one to be taken lightly; the faintest gram light or heavy could mean the difference between life and death. Or, as I just witnessed yesterday, the difference between blemish control and brightly coloured body parts."

Some students laughed, sounding just a bit nervous. "Not to fear, however! You shall learn how to manipulate ingredients into producing the results _you_ wish to see in your potions." He turned to the chalkboard, flicked his wand, and the chalk began scribbling notes on the surface. All of the students were enraptured; one boy at the front of the room was on the edge of his seat and practically draped over his own stone slab to watch the chalk scribble furiously.

"The Five Laws of Potion Making," the boy read aloud.

"Quite right, sir!" Professor Slughorn said jubilantly. "We will first explore the rules of potion making, not unlike the Five Exceptions to magic some of you may have learned in Transfiguration already." Severus let his shoulders slump and a silent sigh pass his lips. He would just pretend he had learned the five laws. "There are some things potions simply cannot do, and I believe this is a good place to start your education about the world of manipulating ingredients. But I simply won't _tell_ you what they are—you shall find out for yourself. Open your textbooks to Chapter Three and buddy up with a partner. Your notes will be due by the next class."

There was a tumult of groans and shuffling papers as students moved around the room to get into pairs and begin their work. Severus glanced around the room briefly, then pulled out his own parchment. He would never approach someone else—that was something he learned in Muggle school: You can't be rejected if you don't set yourself up for failure in the first place. He would be quite content on his own, anyway, and he was sure he could take a few notes without someone else's help.

"Hi, Severus."

He looked up to see her standing next to him, her eyes downcast and her cheeks a little flushed. "Can we work together?"

He shrugged and went back to shuffling through his things before opening his book to Chapter Three. Lily sat down beside him and set up her own things. After a few minutes, in which Severus had already tried setting down to work (but could not take his attention off of the fact that Lily was sitting next to him) the girl finally broke down and blurted: "I'm sorry about yesterday."

Severus glanced at her briefly before going back to his parchment. "S'okay," he muttered.

"I know you were just looking out for me... but that was a mean thing you did. And... I kind of understand the whole Great Hall thing. About not sitting at your table. I'm sorry I did that to you."

He had never apologized to anyone before, but he screwed up his lips, sucked in his breath, and quickly said: "I'm sorry, too." It didn't seem so hard once the words were out.

"Friends again?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah."

They continued their work in quiet, only occasionally pointing out excerpts to each other and referencing each other's work. All of Severus's worries that had been building up ever since he arrived at Hogwarts were dispelled over the course of the hour.


	6. Defence Against the Dark Arts

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing._

_Specific note: Expelliarmus is a spell specifically for disarming the target by _**removing whatever the witch or wizard is holding**. _However, since the spell is capable of shoving over an opponent, I took the liberty of assuming it could shove objects out of pockets, if the spell is directed in a specific way. Heck, it could knock your socks off if the wizard was talented enough!_

_Plus, you know, I wouldn't mind if some of you reading this would say something. Anything. Bash my head in verbally if you wish. I don't post this purely for kicks and giggles—I WANT YOUR FEEDBACK!_

Chapter Six: Defence Against the Dark Arts

Sirius Black and James Potter did not learn their lesson not to perform foolhardy pranks on other students; if anything, they learned to do it without attracting the attention of teachers. Months had passed at school, and in that time Sirius and James had succeeded in spraying Severus with water while in the boys' lavatories, getting Tenacious Toffee in his hair, and lining his cauldron with essence of newt gallbladder—which turned the last potion into something of a frothy disaster—among many things.

Although no one else seemed to see what was going on, Lily could see right through the antics. "Why don't you tell a teacher?" she had said imploringly.

Severus gave her a heated glare. "I'd never give in like that."

"It's not giving _in_, Severus! If you don't tell, I will."

"No!" he urged, a little too loudly. Half of the Herbology class turned to stare. He lowered his voice to a whisper. "No, Lily, don't. Ever."

"Why?"

"Because then they win."

She looked confused and defiant, but she said nothing. Nor did she approach a teacher about the bullying. From then on, Severus was on his guard, of every moment of every day, up until he went to bed each night. Which was what his favourite instructor had taught him to do.

Yevgeniy Utkin was a Russian wizard who used to work for his Ministry tracking wizard crime rings. He had succeeded in taking down half of a gang in the fifties, at the cost of his left arm and his buoyant personality—a strong stunning spell cracked his skull and damaged his frontal lobe, which turned him into the opposite man he had been before. His wife and family left him, and after a few short years he was dismissed by the Russian Ministry of Magic with a hefty severance package. At age thirty-seven, he had been forced into retirement, up until he was offered the position of professor for Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts School.

Although Severus found all his classes easy, he found none as enjoyable as Defence Against the Dark Arts. This, of course, was one of Lily's least favourites—she did not like the idea of Dark magic, and she admitted to not catching on to it as well as Severus did. But his instructor was absolutely enthralling on Severus's terms. Physically, Utkin was unimpressive; he was a short man, thin, balding, and had facial features strongly resembling a duck. As a wizard, however, he was engaging, talented, and just a bit intimidating, which Severus found easy to respect.

Roughly a week before Easter holiday, Lily had asked Severus to meet her in the library to do homework together and spend some time talking; she was tired of only being able to glean a few minutes of conversation here and there in their classes together. On his way across the second floor, he was ambushed—a puddle of oil streaked out across the hall and swept him off his feet. After his head smacked against the stone floor and the ringing in his ears dimmed, he heard raucous laughter echoing off the walls.

Severus rolled onto his stomach and watched as the culprits went racing back down the hallway. He reached for his wand in his pocket and angrily pointed it at Sirius and James, wishing some offensive spell would magically cast itself and hit them, but only sharp white sparks flew out the tip. Severus cursed and slammed his fist into the ground, then slowly stood up, trying to brush the oil off, but only succeeding in spreading it about his robes.

He heard footsteps and immediately thought that the caretaker was going to spot him with the soiled floor and blame him for all the mess, as Severus was often caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, and usually anything that could go wrong, did. But from around the opposite corner where James and Sirius had made their escape, Utkin sauntered into view, his one good arm tucked behind his back, his wooden one hanging at his side.

Severus stared, lost for words, ashamed that his favourite teacher would catch him in a situation that he wanted no one to see him in. Utkin's characteristic scowl was on his face—he looked like that all the time, whether or not he was angry or amused; therefore, the young student was left thinking he was in deep trouble.

"What is this?" he asked with a grunt, eyeing the puddle.

Severus dropped his gaze and shrugged, opting to keep his mouth shut.

"Eh, boy? Attacked?"

Severus lifted his eyes to his professor for a second before averting them again.

"Ah. Here, here." The professor encouraged Severus to turn around, then he muttered a spell. There was an odd sucking noise, like a small vacuum slurping on some liquid, and then the professor patted the boy on the back. The oil was gone.

Severus turned and watched Utkin perform the same spell on the oil spill; the puddle was sucked up into the tip of his wand, making the same curious sucking noise. When it was clean, Utkin turned his scowl back on Severus.

"You vere not on guard," the man said in his thick accent. Severus turned his head away to hide his shame. "Did you not defend yourself?"

"I wanted to," Severus mumbled. "Pay them back."

"Yes, yes, you vould," Utkin replied, and his eyebrows crawled up his forehead—the first change in expression Severus had ever seen cross the professor's face. "Wizarding War out there, boy. Know that, eh? Need to be more prepared. Come. I show you somethink."

Utkin passed Severus and headed for the stairwell. The boy looked between his professor and the direction of the library, then finally turned on his heel and caught up to Utkin, who didn't so much as look over his shoulder to see if Severus was following.

Utkin's classroom was on the fourth floor, on the opposite side of the castle as the library. It overlooked the Quidditch pitch and took in a grand view of the mountain range beyond. Even though windows lined the room and sunlight filtered in along with the beautiful scenery, the professor had still managed to find a way to make the room dark and gloomy. He stepped forward into the room, leading Severus inside, then suddenly—without warning—Utkin spun on his student, his wand in his hand, and Severus's wand immediately flew from his pocket. Severus looked bewildered and stared at the place his wand had landed. Utkin remained still, continuing to point his wand at the boy.

"Disarmink spell." Utkin nodded his head towards the wand. Severus went to retrieve it, and this time clutched it in his hand. Utkin lowered his wand and let Severus get into position.

"You didn't say anything," Severus pointed out.

Utkin humphed. "A vand does not need words... but commands. And commands can be from within. Here!" he shouted, pointing to his forehead. "My English—no good. My spells in Russian. But even better is spells without vords. Enemy has less time to react. Ve practice now."

Severus shook his head. "I can't even do the disarming spell right out loud."

"Eh? You know more spells than N.E.W.T. class, but you not know disarmink spell?" When Severus just shrugged, Utkin nodded solemnly. "One step at time." He lifted his wand and flicked it at the chalkboard. Severus looked over his shoulder to watch the chalk scribble across it furiously; to wrote: "Expelliarmus."

"Vand will respond to you," Utkin said, motioning to the word. "You must be clear. And demandink!"

Severus lifted his wand and pointed it at Utkin. _I want to remove his wand from his hand. I want to disarm him. _"Expelliarmis!" he shouted. His wand wrenched around in his hand and poked him in the eye. "OW!"

Utkin belted out a dry laugh, his scowl never lifting. "Mus. Mus! Not 'miss.'"

Still rubbing his eye, Severus pointed his wand back at Utkin. Now the boy had anger flaring behind his eyes. "Expelliarmus!" he hollered.

The wand jerked in Utkin's hand, but did not fly away. "Good. Better. But not strong enough. More, eh... vhat you say? Convict."

Severus rubbed at his eye one last time before dropping his hand. "Conviction?"

"Yes, yes. A bit of anger helps. But _demand_, power, determine—these overthrow your opponent. This is how to face Dark Arts."

A smile pulled at Severus's lips. The more he learned about this art, the more he wanted. Mustering all his will and desire, he licked his lips together and fixed his professor with heated stare. "Expelliarmus!" he called again.

They practised for over half an hour, in which Utkin gave Severus continuous advice. Finally, Severus succeeded in throwing the wand from Utkin's hand. Utkin gave his barking laugh again, and Severus beamed triumphantly, his dark eyes alight.

"Ah, but how to block it?" Utkin said slyly before quickly pointing his wand and throwing Severus's across the room again. With a flick of his wand, Utkin summoned the boy's to him. He then tossed it back to Severus. "Protego. Reflect."

"Pro-te-go," Severus repeated, then mumbled continuously under his breath. Utkin lifted his wand, and instinctively Severus held his wand in front of him and shouted the spell. The wand still left his hand, but it only flew about two feet before clattering on the ground.

"Mmm... vords are not enough," Utkin said, holding his wand upright and sweeping it across his chest. "You must _shield_ yourself. Draw it in front of you. Bounce spell back."

Severus practised another twenty minutes with Utkin before he finally succeeded in bouncing the spell back at Utkin, whose wand flew from his hand. Utkin clapped his good hand into his wooden palm, looking positively disgusted, but by now Severus had learned enough of the man to see that he was, in fact, quite thoroughly impressed.

"Bravo," he said, then went to retrieve his wand. "Ve stop today. Too ahead of classmates."

Severus wanted to keep going, to learn more about how to fight back and put those stupid Gryffindors in their place, but he knew better than to look whiny and ungrateful to Utkin. As the man stopped to pick up his wand, he glowered back at Severus. "Go on." He waved his hand to shoo the boy. "Out. Out!"

"Thank you," Severus mumbled quickly before dashing from the room.

"And remember, alvays be on your guard!"

The door slammed behind him and he hopped around, staring at it, a satisfied smile dawning on his lips. Eventually he turned and shuffled down the corridor, gently swishing his wand from side to side, muttering the two spells he had learned under his breath.

Then he remembered that he was supposed to meet with Lily over an hour ago.

Flying down the corridor, he hissed and spat curse words, taking corners at dangerous speeds and jumping down the stone steps in the stairwell. He rushed across the second floor, passing a painting that hollered: "Come back here, you conniving thief!" and all but burst through the doors into the library, making more racket than was acceptable. Everyone shot angry eyes up at the intruder, and Madam Pince appeared from behind a bookshelf, her face contorted with the utmost rage.

"Out!" she whispered hoarsely, "OUT!"

"But—"

She stormed him like a rabid Hippogriff, her arms flailing. Severus backed out of the library and she shut the doors after him. He stood outside for a few minutes, waiting until he thought Madam Pince had slunk back into the recesses of the library, then quietly slipped between the doors.

No one noticed him this time. He tiptoed through the aisles and shelves, slinking from table to table in search of Lily. He met a few disgruntled Hufflepuffs and irritable Slytherins that did not appreciate his passing them by ("You'd think we're in a zoo, the privacy is so shoddy here,") before he finally found Lily sitting by her lonesome at a table near the Restricted Section. She was glaring down at her parchment and absently flipping the pages of her textbook.

"Lily!" Severus whispered, "Lily, you'll never guess—"

"Where _were_ you?" she hissed back, eyes ablaze. "I've been waiting since breakfast!"

"I know, but Professor Utkin brought me to his classroom and taught me some defence spells," Severus said, unable to rid himself of his stupid grins. "He mentioned something about a war... I don't know what he was talking about, but I want to show the spells to you, come on—"

"No!" she said firmly, pressing the butt of her fist into the table. "I have work to do, which you promised you'd help me with, and I have absolutely _no_ interest in the Dark Arts."

"It's not—"

"Either don't talk to me or go away," she said brusquely, propping up her book and hiding her face from view. Severus felt a sting of annoyance as he stared at the face of her textbook. It's not like he had intentionally ditched her. Well, apart from the fact he had wanted to press on his lessons, he didn't stand her up. And he was here now, wasn't he?

As the minutes ticked on, however, he gave in with a sigh. "What one are you working on?" he asked.

She remained silent for a moment before peeking her eyes over the top of the book. "The essay on vampire characteristics."

Severus sidled next to her and sat down, looking over her parchment. "Hates crucifixes and... what is this?"

Lily looked insulted, but a definite flush hit her cheeks. "It's all I know about vampires!"

"Muggles _think_ this stuff? About coffins and crosses and everything?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Yes. _Muggles_ think that stuff."

Severus tried to hide his distaste by grabbing her textbook and burying his nose in it as he flipped to chapter twenty-six. "Here—vampires prefer the night, but they don't sleep in coffins. And they're not averted by crucifixes, but by garlic."

"I knew that," Lily said defiantly. "I just hadn't got to that paragraph yet."

Severus got out his parchment and quill and laid it out on the table. Lily put the textbook between them and cast a spell on her parchment to wipe it clean of ink. Then they set to work together.

Finally, after several moments of consideration, Severus said: "Sorry." It still took him more willpower and mustering than should have been necessary in order to apologize.

Lily made no response, but visibly relaxed after that. They worked together mostly in silence, but once in a while compared each other's work and went in search for further information. By the time they finished their respective essays, it was near dinner time. They walked down to the Great Hall together, chatting idly about classes.

Before they even breached the double doors, Severus saw James and Sirius walking together down the adjacent hall; they would intercept each other, and almost instantly Severus anticipated an ambush. He reached for his wand and pointed it at the boys, shouting: "Expelliarmus!"

It looked as if a giant bubble had popped between the two friends, for they bounced apart by half a foot and their wands fell from their pockets. They looked up bewilderingly at Severus, then their bemused faces became angry ones. They stooped to pick up their wands—

"SNAPE!"

Severus jumped and spun around. Professor McGonagall was descending upon him quickly, her robes billowing behind her. The sight was enough to make even Severus cower a bit. "What on earth's good graces are you _doing_?"

Severus only stared up at her silently. Lily was stammering uncontrollably, and the two boys behind him were sniggering into their hands.

"My office, now," she barked, leading him along past the Great Hall. Lily gave him a look of shock mixed with disapproval, and the boys made rude gestures at him as they passed—behind the professor's back, of course.

Professor McGonagall's office was small, round, and had the definite air of a serious, down-to-business place. There was a fireplace that took up nearly half the room with a strong, soft fire burning in the hearth and several pictures of witches and wizards over the mantle. The professor bid Severus to sit at the desk; she looked down at him from over her square frames.

"I will be retrieving your head of house—do _not_ leave this room, or the seriousness of your offence will have doubled."

Severus did not dare defy her. When she swept out of the room, his courage and confidence in his actions fizzled into miserable frustration. The irony of getting in trouble for preempting his attackers was aggravating and unjust. _Where dwell the brave at heart... more like where dwell the fake and not so smart._ But he was the one in trouble now—not so smart. Should have waited for them to make the first move. He kicked at the desk, then immediately made sure he hadn't put a dent in it.

Shortly thereafter, Professor McGonagall returned with Professor Slughorn. He looked down at his student forlornly, a bit of regret and sympathy in his eyes. "I have shared my events of the story, Severus, you may present your case," Professor McGonagall said.

Severus looked up at the Potions Master, and all his defiant courage returned. "They were going to attack me, so I was just protecting myself by disarming them!"

"Professor McGonagall saw no such thing, Severus," Professor Slughorn replied with an air of reluctance. "I will have to take her word for it; you cast a spell on two students without warrant. I'm afraid I will have to take fifty points from Slytherin and give you detention for tomorrow night."

Severus's mouth fell open, but he did not draw the trump card he knew would get him out of trouble. _They've been attacking me for weeks, they bully me_. He would rather accept punishment before putting himself to shame.

"See me in my office tomorrow night after dinner," Slughorn declared. He then left the office, muttering something to Professor McGonagall. The Transfiguration Instructor then turned on Severus.

"Very well, you may go." As Severus stood and sulked to the door, she added: "May I suggest you keep your wand safely tucked in your pocket, Snape, to avoid attacking students unprovoked."

Severus kept his mouth shut and stormed out of the office.

On his way back to the Great Hall, he met Utkin, strolling almost leisurely down the corridor. Severus stopped next to him and simply stared. Utkin scowled back.

"Eh, boy?" This was turning out to be his customary greeting, it seemed.

"Hullo. Sir."

"Ah... spell not vork for you?"

Severus shrugged. "I got caught."

"Mm. Not on guard."

Severus stared back with such acid that his expression was only rivalled by his professor's. "I was on my guard, though! I got them before they could even lay a hand on their wands!"

"No, no, no, no, no," Utkin chastised, tsking and wagging a finger at Severus. "You get caught, yes? Not on guard. Must be avare of your surroundink. Alvays." Utkin leaned forward and squinted a mean eye at Severus. The boy only swallowed and stared back.

Utkin passed his pupil and moved on to the Great Hall, where dinner was already halfway done. Severus whipped his head around once his professor was gone, taking in the area. No one and nothing. He walked slowly after Utkin to the Great Hall, his eyes all around. He was even straining his ears, so that he might hear someone approaching from behind. Once he noticed he was walking half as slow as usual, he picked up his pace and dropped some of his paranoia. Being on guard does not mean reacting faster, he could hear Utkin say. It means knowing your own limits and abilities.

He'd show James and Sirius. Next time.


	7. Tobias and the Prince

_Author's Note: This story is based off of events and conversations as found throughout the _Harry Potter_ series as written by J.K. Rowling. Most of this work will contain original prose and dialogue, but references will be made in specific chapters where Rowling's exact words are used. This is written purely for recreational purposes; I do not own any rights to _Harry Potter_ or affiliations of Bloomsbury Publishing._

_And this is all she wrote. Hah. There's still a good twenty-five chapters to go, but they're all fragmented and unfinished at this point. Updating from hereon in will be irregular and monthly at best. In the meantime, why not REVIEW. K thx_

Chapter Seven: Tobias and the Prince

The year came and went so quickly, Severus wondered whether or not it had been a dream. The things he was sure would happen that year did not. He never did become friends with his roommates, only cordial acquaintances; he never did learn how to cast spells without making a sound; and he never did get James or Sirius back, even though he had designed several strategies to ambush them—what spells to use, where, from what angle. However, as unsuccessful as Severus was, his two rivals were equally at failure—not one more prank was pulled on the young Slytherin. Severus noticed the boys became friends with the perpetually sick boy he had met in the infirmary on his first day, but he never attributed their lack of attacks with that boy's friendship.

One of the more disappointing outcomes of the end of the year was the resignation of Severus's favourite instructor. Yevgeniy Utkin had to regretfully resign when his Ministry called him out of retirement; there was a resurgence in the underground wizarding world of the U.S.S.R.—Severus wondered if it had to do with the war Utkin had mentioned once—and therefore the old Wizard Hunter's services were needed.

His farewell with Severus had left something to be desired, but for Severus, that was as successful as most of his social interactions tended to be. Before he left the castle to head to Hogwarts Station, he poked his head into Utkin's office.

"Uh..." He cleared his throat. "Professor?"

"Vh... yew?" The old man spun around—it looked like he had aged ten years—and glowered at Severus like never before. "Vhat? More lessons?"

"No," Severus said, remaining concealed by half the door as he stared at his shoes. "Um... thanks. Sir. For the lessons."

"Vah!" He waved his good hand around. He went back to his pack, shifting around things needlessly with his wooden arm while picking at other trinkets on his desk. Severus stood there for a good thirty seconds, trying to find the right words to say. "Bye" just didn't seem satisfactory enough. When Utkin continued to ignore him and pack his trunk, seemingly uninterested in any sort of expression of gratitude, Severus simply turned and walked away.

The train ride home was sad, though Severus would never admit it in a thousand years. After reluctantly changing back into his Muggle clothes, he sat with Lily in a compartment shared by the perpetually grinning boy he had sat with last September. There seemed to be little change in his demeanour since then. The two friends were chatty, going over their final tests again and comparing answers. For some reason Severus felt desperate and anxious, as if he wouldn't see Lily again all summer. While at Hogwarts, it was as if he had forgotten they had been friends for a whole year before coming to the school; they lived close to each other, and visited one another often. He would see her over the summer. But she would be seeing him as Severus Snape, the boy living in Spinner's End—unkempt, uncared for, and generally unimpressive. Only two months, he told himself, then they would be back at Hogwarts, and he could be Severus Snape the wizard again.

At King's Cross Station, the two friends stepped off the train to find a sea of parents and families awaiting the return of their loved ones. Lily bounded off across the platform almost as soon as she stepped on it, hurtling herself toward her parents. Severus hung back and watched.

Marigold Evans stooped and swept her daughter up in a hug. Her hair had grown longer, and she had it tied back in a loose ponytail. John Evans, on the other hand, looked like he had lived ten years in the past one; his already aged and haggard appearance had become more wearisome, his skin sagging off his face and the grey speckle at his temples spreading to the entire lower half of his hair. He smiled weakly down at his daughter, looking more tired than a one-hundred year-old man. Lily hugged him around the waist, too.

Severus looked around the platform for his mother. She usually wore a black Muggle dress and hat, her thin, sleek hair tousled about her shoulders. But he couldn't find her.

As families began to disperse and wander off the platform back to Platforms 9 and 10, he hoped to catch a glimpse of her, but to no avail. Maybe she was running late, and was on her way to the station. He would wait for her to come back.

"Severus!" Lily called, rushing back to him. "Severus... where's your mum?"

He shrugged, avoiding her eyes. "I don't think she's here yet."

"Oh." She remained where she stood, looking back at her parents. "Do you want to come with us? I'm sure my dad would give you a ride."

"No."

"Okay. Um... well... see you at the glade, then? Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure."

She gave another one of her sad smiles. "Bye, Severus."

"Bye."

She turned and fled, her dark red hair flying like a banner behind her. Severus collected his trunk and sat on it, watching as the Evanses left the platform through the barrier. Soon everyone had left the platform but Severus. After an hour, the conductor approached him.

"Do you have someone coming for you?" he asked gently. He was a portly man, and looked almost like a large green pepper in his robes. Severus shrugged.

"Someone should be coming for me," he said.

"Well... I'll stay with you for half an hour, but then I have to take the engine back into the train yard, and then I have to close down the platform."

Severus looked down at his shoes. The conductor went about his business, along with some other wizards buzzing about the platform, tending to the upkeep and small repairs. Half an hour had come and gone, and the conductor escorted Severus to the barrier. "Sorry, son... I'll have a Muggle car arrive for you, if you want."

Severus was about to decline when he subtly nodded his head. The conductor slowly walked through the barrier with him and marched him to the ticket booth. He asked the vendor if she could summon a driver for the young man. She regarded the wizard like he was some escaped lunatic (which he probably appeared to be in his vibrant green robes and hat) and dialled the operator, who in turn sent a cabby. Severus sat on his trunk outside the station's entrance, his head in his hands, torn between being glum and put out. When the cab arrived, he helped Severus stuff his trunk into the back, then drove him home to Spinner's End.

Night was settling when Severus arrived home. It was when the driver pulled up before the Snapes' front door did Severus realize he had no more Muggle money on him. "I have to get my money from inside, sorry," he said quickly, then shot out of the cab and bolted up to the door. When he tried the handle, it was locked. He knocked and knocked and knocked, intent on wracking his mother with guilt—

The door opened, and Tobias Snape stood there, looking down at his son as if he was regarding a spoiled dinner.

Severus froze into place, not daring to move or speak. But slowly his shock and timidness washed away and a frown took form on his face. "Where's my mum?" he asked sharply.

"Severus?" he heard her call. She suddenly came into view from the kitchen. Her face fell and her jaw dropped.

"I need to pay the cab driver," he said, pointing his thumb over his shoulder and filling her silence. Both his parents glanced at the cab. Tobias grunted and stepped forward, pulling out his wallet from his back pocket and fishing out a few notes. Eileen stepped forward and stood in front of her son. She held out her hands as if to clutch his shoulders, but let her hands hover a foot away from him. The boy averted his eyes and turned his body away from her.

"What is he doing here?" he asked in a low voice. She didn't answer.

Tobias stopped behind Severus, who was blocking the doorway. He held son's trunk in his hands. "Well," said Tobias gruffly, motioning through the door. Severus stepped inside.

The house was in a bit of disarray since he had last been there. There was an underlying smell of a general lack of care; there were assorted piles of papers and other odd objects piled here and there; thick layers of dust covered almost everything. Serene smells wafted from the kitchen, however—no longer was his mother cooking rice in the kitchen; he could smell tomato sauce and hear boiling water.

He turned to regard his mother, prepared to fix her with a guilt-inducing glare, but his face fell at the sight of her. Under the light, she looked dead and waxen; her dull red hair was even plainer, and permanent bags had formed under her eyes. She looked like the most tired woman in the world, especially when she regarded Severus with an expression akin to horror. His father hadn't changed much in the past year, and still looked at Severus the same emotionally vacant way he usually did. His black hair had grown shaggier and his beard had grown wild and tangled. He had a feral look in his eye that suggested he had been living in the country with the animals ever since he abandoned his wife and child. Severus dared to narrow his eyes at him.

"That's how you greet your father?" he huffed, grabbing Severus by the scruff on his neck and tugging him forward into the house. "Go put your things away. Dinner's almost on the table."

Severus stooped to pick up his trunk and laboriously hauled it up the stairs to his room. When he got there, he kicked the door open, sending it flying into the wall. It nearly bounced back and hit him in the face, but he stopped it with his foot and dragged his things to the foot of his bed. He then fought the urge to slam the door shut and closed it gently instead, roaring silently to himself and throwing his fists through the air. Tobias Snape was supposed to be gone from his life forever. He knew his mother was pining after the man, but despite her sadness, Severus had been so glad when his father had walked out of his life. And suddenly he was back, as if everything were supposed to be normal that way.

Severus slowly sunk down on top of his trunk and ran his hands through his hair angrily. He didn't want that stupid git of a father in his life any more than he wanted to spend two months alone with Sirius and James on an isolated island. The entire summer would be a prison sentence, and he would not be able to escape, with or without Lily just a few blocks away.

How he had pretended like _Severus_ was intruding! They had forgotten him at the station, the day everyone knew the students of Hogwarts were to return home, and neither of them even muttered an apology for it! It took a tremendous amount of willpower not to kick the door in front of him in anger. If he displayed any signs of aggression, his father would certainly take the challenge and show far more aggression back. Now that Severus was twelve, practically a young man, he felt a strong desire to pick a fight with his father, but the small voice of reason was still loud enough to convince Severus that doing so would be a _very_ bad idea. So he would collect himself, go down to dinner, and grudgingly pretend like nothing was wrong. He would have to for the entire summer, if he was to survive.

As he walked down the steps, he heard his mother setting the table. The smell of pasta and sauce filled his nostrils, and it would have been welcoming and enticing, had his nerves not been so on edge. In the kitchen, his father was waiting impatiently at the table, tapping his foot and staring at the back of Eileen's head as she tipped the pot of pasta into a serving bowl. The tension in the room was so taught that it could have snapped at any second. Severus grudgingly sat down at his spot at the table, keeping his eyes pointed at the scratch shaped like teeth marks on the opposite side of Tobias. That was his focus point whenever he needed to divert his concentration elsewhere.

Eileen set plates in front of the two and went to retrieve her own. Because she had only been expecting cooking for two, each person's portions were smaller than they would have been. As his mother sat down, she reached for Severus's hand and squeezed. He pulled it away deftly.

They ate silently for the most part. Just before dinner was finished, Tobias cleared his throat. "Gonna have you help clean this place up," he muttered. "A little unkempt around here."

Severus remained silent. He was surprised that his father did not force a "Yes, sir" out of him. Severus decided the smart first move would be to wash the dishes, so once he was done he waited for his parents, then collected their plates. Tobias left the table and climbed up the stairs to his and his wife's bedroom. Severus filled the sink with water and started to dip in the plates with the soap. His mother stepped up behind him, grabbed his shoulders. "Severus," she whispered ever so quietly.

The boy shrugged his mother's hands off his shoulders and grabbed the dish rag. "Just slipped your mind?" he snapped. She did not reply. After a few minutes of standing quietly behind him while he washed off the dishes, she stepped next to him and grabbed a towel to dry.

"I don't want your help," he informed her stonily.

She hesitated in putting the towel back in the drawer before turning and leaving Severus to his task. _He_ had to do this, only him. No one could help him.

In the morning, his plan had fallen to pieces. It wasn't in his nature to take things passively; his father had goaded him with insults far too many times than he could tolerate. But the final straw had been the slight against his mother—he hated how she just took it from that good for nothing Muggle, and he was angry at the both of them for being so...

He had come down stairs for breakfast—toast and fruit—and the moment he sat down, Tobias's resentment started to spill over.

"Know what you did to my head? Hm? Last year?"

Severus stared resolutely at his plate and said nothing.

"Cracked my head open. Had to go to the hospital for the night. Suffered a concussion."

"I didn't do that. The bookcase fell."

"Don't think I don't know about your types," he retorted. "You folk can make anything you want happen. Bunch of freaks."

Eileen was quietly dishing out her own breakfast. As she sat down, Tobias grabbed her by the arm and shook her, shaking her toast off the plate and onto the table. "And I suppose he wasn't at Smeltings School for Boys all year, was he?"

Eileen said nothing, but met her husband with wide, horror-struck eyes. "That's where I was, yeah," Severus lied for her as he tore the crust off his toast with vigour. "Too bad you didn't remember to _pick me up_."

"Spiteful brat, aren't you?" Tobias grumbled, snatching up the marmalade and spreading it over his own toast. Eileen silently slipped her own serving back on her plate and waited complacently to dress her toast. "The first thing you need to learn about life is that it's unfair," Tobias continued. "The second thing: it's not all about you."

"'S not about you, either," Severus hissed under his breath.

Tobias had put his buttering knife down on his plate with a clank and clatter, and so Severus's reproach was drowned out. Instead, Tobias picked up the conversation where he had started it. "I won't have you learning your mother's... trade," Tobias said. "It's already proven dangerous for normal people like me."

_Of course it would be—I want to KILL people like you_.

"You know, maybe I've not been a big part in raising you right," Tobias ventured, stuffing half of his toast into his mouth and chewing it enthusiastically. "Be more of a father figure to you. What did they teach you at Smeltings?"

Severus hesitated for only a second. "How to defend myself."

Tobias seemed to approve of this answer; he straightened and nodded, his entire air changing from irascible to impressed. "Good lesson in life to learn."

Severus shrugged. He hated to find himself eager for this man's approval; the moment Tobias seemed to accept him, Severus felt a surge of pride. _Not from this Muggle_, Severus told himself. _I hate him, I hate him I HATE HIM!_

The rest of breakfast passed in silence. Eileen sat and waited until Tobias was finished with his plate before standing and collecting the dishes. Tobias pulled his plate back. "Let him do it," he said crossly, motioning to his son.

However soft and quiet her voice was, Severus was surprised to hear her retort with: "He did them last night."

"And he'll do them today, and tomorrow, and the next day," his father shot back. "Now put them down, witch!"

A ravenous beast flared in anger inside Severus and he jumped up to his feet before he even knew what he was doing. Eileen's face was shrouded in fear; Tobias's, in anger.

"And what the bloody hell do you have to say about it then, eh?" The large man got to his own feet and stared him down. Severus was quickly losing an internal battle; the vow to keep silent and complacent all summer was quickly dissolving as he glowered up at the good for nothing Muggle intruding in his life.

"Witch... isn't a very nice thing to call someone," Severus said, immediately thinking of Lily. He imagined her standing in the corner—and if Lily was in the room, he couldn't be weak. If he couldn't lay dormant at his father's feet all summer, he had to at least always be strong in front of her.

"None of your bleedin' business, boy," Tobias snorted. "You know what this woman did to me? Ended my career, she did. Some sports fanatic gets herself pregnant and pins the bastard on me. Forced me to marry her—though some ceremony it was, just some old bloke shooting sparks in the air, bunch of toss pots in costume—and then tried to get me to move to some fantasy land town, claimin' she was magic. So you know what, _Severus_? Witch is a fairly appropriate name for her, given she claimed she was one."

"You—"

"I'm not finished!" Tobias thundered, slamming his fist on the table and making the saltshakers jump. Eileen flinched and covered her mouth with a hand. "Then you came along. Gives you come toss pot name from your toss pot heritage, then tries to raise you the—what was it called?—the _wizarding way_. I told her if she wanted a father for her runt, she would raise you _my_ way. Took enough of my life away from me as is. But even if she did send you off to Smelting's like I said you ought to, even after I was gone, I don't see a _spec _of myself in you, you little bastard. Black hair's all we got between us. She's been secretly raising you like the freak you are, and my word's not been respected _once_ in all your pathetic years.

"I'm a tolerant man, but I won't have an ungrateful family sucking my life money dry like the parasites you are. Either you show some respect—both of you—or there won't be any more second chances."

Severus was so furious he could hardly speak; his fingernails dug so deep within his palm that he could feel blood seeping under them. There were thousands of retorts he wanted to say, so many things he could have done to put this stupid, filthy Muggle in his place. His imagined Lily still stood in the corner, wide-eyed and cowering, waiting for Severus to set things straight and show off his bravery. But his jaw locked in place, and all he could do was glower up at the balding idiot who reluctantly named himself Severus's father.

And then the words came from him before he could stop them. Quiet, soft, yet full of compassion and abhorrence. "I never wanted you here."

Tobias blinked and cocked his head to the side, placing a hand to his ear. Eileen whimpered, a choked sound, which made Severus's guts twist and turn. "Sorry, might want to repeat that—don't think I caught you," Tobias said tonelessly. By the way he said it, Severus knew the man had already decided his son would suffer dearly for those words.

So he held his tongue and stood his ground. In his mind's eye, Lily became more fearful and begged him to take it back, and her pleading helped him stay still, though his courage had long fled. He felt more powerful.

But he no longer felt powerful the moment his mother screamed. He had never heard such a sound in his life; it made his heart drop through the floor and his bowels quiver. He hadn't noticed his father was upon him until he was thrown to the floor.

The first punch stung for only a moment, and then he could no longer feel his cheek. He felt the force of his father's strikes, but only because of how his head swung like deadweight on his neck. His mother's scream seemed far off, now—all he could hear was his own breathing and his father's grunts as he smacked him.

Lily had long since disappeared from the corner.

Severus was not aware of when the strikes stopped; everything he heard and saw seemed to be coming from a long tunnel, and when he swivelled his head around (which felt like a melon on a toothpick), he saw Tobias slowly crawling along the floor, out of the kitchen and into the front hall. Eileen was standing by the table, her hands over her face, her eyes as wide and fearful as he had ever seen them. A wand was on the floor between them.

She said something and reached out to touch her husband. The way the man flinched and scampered away from her made Severus more scared than he had been all morning. As he started to fall asleep (_I just woke up, how am I tired?_ he thought distantly), he saw his father cower—_cower—_in Eileen's presence. He shouted something in a pleading manner, but Severus never caught what it was.

He had been staring at Eileen for a good thirty seconds before he realized he was awake. She was dabbing his face with cotton balls, deliberately avoiding his gaze. It took a while for his memory to catch up to his thoughts. When he felt the sting just under his eye from the hydrogen peroxide, he remembered that Muggle's fist in his face, he remembered the numb sting on his cheek.

"Did he leave?" Severus asked groggily.

Eileen still did not meet his eyes. "No, he's here," she muttered.

"Why didn't he? You did—" he wheezed and took a second to catch his breath. "You did something to him, didn't you?"

"Severus." It was a warning. He did not heed it.

"He said you ended his career."

This time she looked at him, her trembling hand hovering over his eyebrow. Severus shrank at what he saw in her face: he had never seen her so angry.

When Severus was a boy, long before he met Lily, his mother had told him of her budding career as a Quidditch player. She told him all about the sport—first about the way it was played, the rules, famous players—then about strategies, tricks of the trade. She had been so good in her school years that she was offered a spot as a reserve in a national women's league in London. She moved to the city to be a part of the team.

Since the wizarding community was quite small in the city, Eileen spent time integrating into Muggle communities, trying to "fit in." Somewhere along the way, she met Tobias Snape, and was enamoured to the point of throwing away her career in order to be a wife and a mother. From the way she used to tell the story, Severus had guessed that at the time it had been a happy decision, but had soon soured and spoiled as the years went on.

But he had never heard that Muggle's story. Even though he could care less about the man, he had been undeniably interested in what was said. Ended my career. Forced me to marry her. Kid ruined everything.

"He was lying, right?" Severus said, filling up the silence and trying to assuage the woman's growing anger.

Instead of answering, she put the cotton balls aside and unstopped a vial of potion. Fitting a hand behind his head, she lifted Severus up and tipped it against his lips. He unquestioningly took a few sips before closing his mouth and letting it spill over his smock—he felt a weird tingling sensation on his tongue, which spread down his throat and up his head.

"Don'..."

When he woke again, he was in his room. It was quiet in the house. He sat up—felt too dizzy—fell back down. He stared at the ceiling, straining his ears to hear _something_. It hadn't been this quiet since that Muggle left last summer.

After his head cleared, he ventured downstairs. There was a heavy foreboding weighing heavily on his shoulders; he felt like he was entering dangerous territory, where someone who wanted to murder him was lurking. He probably felt that way because Tobias was in the sitting room, and the way he was crumpled in his chair made him look like a madman on the brink of committing blood lust.

Eileen was sitting quietly next to him, staring at her hands in her lap. When Severus stood at the threshold, she looked up at him blankly. Tobias squirmed—why was he sitting like that?

Severus stared between the two of them. No one spoke a word—until Tobias whimpered and squirmed under his son's gaze.

"Shhh," Eileen cooed, patting her husband's hand. It twitched as if he wanted to pull away but couldn't. Severus felt uneasy; deep down he realized he was horrified by what he was seeing, but he didn't feel scared on the surface. He knew his mother had done something to the Muggle. Years of her submitting to his abuse and then seeing her domineer over him like this was very unnerving.

"What's wrong with him?" Severus asked.

"Go to your room," was all she said.

For days they were all trapped in the house together; Eileen would not let Severus leave, and Tobias did not seem to have the volition to go. When his mother went to work, Severus spent the day in his room, avoiding the strange Muggle downstairs who would not leave his chair. When the phone rang, Severus let it go and never answered it. He spent his days reading out of his textbook, learning new hexes and putting them to heart. Learning spells was one of the few ways to keep his mind off of his prison.

Four days after the kitchen incident, someone knocked on the front door. "Don't answer it," Eileen had said. She did not even let Severus approach the door. The visitor stayed at the door for a good five minutes before giving up the ghost. After sitting together in maddening silence for the entire afternoon, Severus finally snapped on his mother.

"Tell me what's going on."

Eileen finished sipping at her tea before bringing a cup to her husband's lips. He shook like a leaf as she came near.

"Tell me what you did with that Muggle!"

"He's your father," she said coolly without even looking at her son. "You will call him as such."

Severus bent his brow and glowered. "I want to know what's going on."

Eileen continued to dote on Tobias, pointedly avoiding looking at her son. She then lifted up a note and handed it to Severus offhandedly. Grabbing for it, thinking it would delve into the situation, he was surprised to see Lily's handwriting under his fingers. He unfolded the letter and read it.

"It's from your friend, isn't it?" his mother asked dejectedly. It felt colder than it sounded.

"I was supposed to meet with her a few days ago. She was wondering where I was."

"She left it in the mailbox." She suddenly turned her eyes on her son; any glimmer of warmth that used to be there was conspicuously gone. "I want you to see her tomorrow and tell her not to come 'round here anymore."

"Why?"

"I don't want her coming here anymore, Severus, do I make myself clear?"

Severus tripped over his own tongue, his own anger, because he was not used to going head to head with his mother. "No, you don't!"

"Get out of my sight."

Severus moved his lips, but no sound came out. He was lost for words; his mother had never acted this way toward him. Tobias squirmed in his seat again as she swept away errant strands of hair from his forehead, but the man appeared not to be able to move any more than that. Severus stood there for a minute trying to find the right biting words to attack his mother with, but nothing came to him. He finally stormed off, stomped up the stairs, and closed his bedroom door. Then he opened it again and slammed it instead.

What his mother had told him, without saying a thing, is that that Muggle meant more to her than Severus did. Always had, always would. Because she was hopelessly in love with Tobias, and he shed less than favourable light on his son, Severus would be the blight on their relationship that Eileen would always try to cover up, subtly brush aside to please her husband. Even after how he treated her, she was broken when he was gone, and would always accept him with open arms. What she told Severus then was that he was just as unwanted as he had always felt.

Severus thought he knew his mother—sad but caring, weak but enduring. That woman downstairs wasn't capable of care, and apparently anything but weak, given that she was obviously putting that Muggle under a hex to keep him from leaving her again. Why would she want that Muggle so badly? She was so stupid! He tormented them for years, and when he walked out that door the first time, Severus felt free for the first time in his life. Now he felt more trapped than ever, and it was because of his mother.

He hated her, too. Just as much as him. They both didn't care about him, so he wouldn't care about them. Especially her. That witch...

He went downstairs after an hour of fuming, thinking of all the things he would have said, had he been given the chance to turn back time and tell his mother off proper. Now he was calm; he knew exactly what he wanted to say, and he knew he would get what he wanted from her.

As he stood before them, Severus clutched Lily's note tight in his pocket. Eileen didn't pay attention to him; she stared lovingly at her pet, crumpled up in the recliner.

"Teach me how to do it," Severus requested eagerly.


End file.
